MINIVIEWS TAKE TWO

I think somewhere along the line I swore to myself that I’d never let it get to the point where I do a bunch of miniviews again but…here we are.

Same rules as last time: I will discuss my main thoughts on the film, choose a standout element, say whether or not I think you should see it, and rate it. And then I’ll make some cute promise about not doing this again. 🌝

(This time I blame real life and also the release of Luigi’s Mansion 3. HAVE Y’ALL PLAYED THAT YET IT’S SO GOOOOOOOOD)

Lessgoooooooooo:

MINIVIEW 1: DORA AND THE LOST CITY OF GOLD

MY THOUGHTS:

I can honestly say that I never thought in the year of our lord 2019 I would be writing about a movie that is a live-action adaptation of Dora: The Explorer and be saying that it’s…really, really good.

I mean like even the trailers had me like “wow that looks…decent??” And uh…it was???

But more than that, the movie is, as I like to say, a damn good time. If you grew up with the TV show like I did, it’s such a funky little love letter to everything we loved and hated about the show. My poor parents knew like nothing about it and I may or may not have made them a presentation on Dora basics so they knew what they were signing up for by going with me to see this.

It’s genuinely so much fun–it has great characters, a pLot TWisT, a lovely story, JUNGLE PUZZLES!!!, and even a really cool moral. It knew exactly how ridiculous it was and just ROLLED WITH IT.

I mean y’all someone literally made a movie of that College Humor skit from YEARS AGO…AND IT WAS GREAT.

STANDOUT ELEMENT:

Y’ALL DORA LITERALLY USED A YO-YO AS A WEAPON I–

I started learning yo-yo tricks this year (or as we in the in-crowd say, I started “throwing” this year) and I keep trying to tell people that a yo-yo could be a seriously good weapon, I mean do you know how many times I’ve whacked myself this thing is a hazard??

AND SHE LITERALLY USED IT AS A WEAPON I CANNOT–

Also I loved whenever Dora spoke to the camera or whenever she talked to people like “Hi! I’m Dora!” Like she’s a ray of sunshine and I love her.

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

PLEASE DO. It’s just so much fun. Also–a Latinx-led cast!

Also stay tuned for my essay on how Dora and Alita went through very similar character arcs in their respective films but Dora’s actually worked and developed her character more and she’s literally DORA THE EXPLORER–

Haha just kidding.

…unless? 🌝

All in all, I give Dora and the Lost City of Gold…

5/5 DEADLY WEAPON YO-YOS!!

MINIVIEW 2: BLINDED BY THE LIGHT

MY THOUGHTS:

Lemme preface this by saying that Bend It Like Beckham is one of my favorite movies of all time, and the same people worked on this movie, so I was already really excited about it.

And like, I was not disappointed at all.

This movie is a delight from start to finish. The characters are lovable and well-rounded and the story is just so fun and heartwarming. There’s a little bit of drama, a little bit of romance, a lotta friendship, a lotta Bruce Springsteen music, and a whole lot of family love. There’s kinda something for everyone in this movie.

(I mean hey, if you’re a blood-and-gore action fan, there’s even a protest that interferes with a wedding party and someone gets injured and you see the blood, so–yay there you go I guess!)

My biggest complaint is the girlfriend character. Don’t get me wrong, she’s super cute and a delight, but at least in my view, her whole character was just: Girlfriend. That’s it. What music does she like? We don’t know. Her family? We don’t know. Favorite color?? WE DON’T KNOW.

Granted, she’s not the main focus at all, but they spent a whole lot of time developing our leading man, his ex-best friend and his new best friend, so like…if they all get development…….can my girl get some development too……..

I mean it’s like you could switch out her and Alita and neither of their movies would change very much….I’m just sayin…….🌚

STANDOUT ELEMENT:

By far the incorporation of Springsteen’s music. Just like you saw in the trailer, they had the lyrics appear onscreen in real time and it was such a fun little thing to do–I mean don’t we all feel a little like that when listening to music??

No???? Just me???????? Cool.

Also that whole scene where they takeover the radio booth at school and then dance around the streets and go crazy? So fun to watch.

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

Generally? Yes. And I’m speaking as someone who knew absolutely none of the songs used in the film. So if you’re worried about that, please know that you’ll still really enjoy it.

But I also know that this is my type of movie…it’s a character drama about relationships and the power they can have in our lives (also, music) and I ABSOLUTELY eat that shit up. If it’s not your kind of thing, you probably won’t like this movie.

But if you’re home one night and just want a feel-good drama with some great tunes, I definitely recommend you check this movie out.

All in all, I give Blinded by the Light…

4/5 CASSETTE TAPES!!!

MINIVIEW 3: DOWNTON ABBEY

MY THOUGHTS:

*sniff* SO THE ROYAL SERVANTS ARE MEAN AND ANNA AND BATES WORK TOGETHER AND THEY’RE HAPPY FOR ONCE *sob* AND CARSON COMES BACK BECAUSE MARY NEEDS HIM *deep inhale* AND THOMAS OH GOD MY SWEET BABY THOMAS IS HAPPY *long sniff* AND THE SCENE WITH MARY AND MAGGIE SMITH AT THE BALL OH GOD–*all-out-crying*

Uh so yeah it was okay.

I think what I really, really loved about this was that it never tried to be anything more but an elongated episode of the tv show. Like it didn’t try to be anything that would draw in a different audience because it trusted that all of us would be absolute SUCKERS and come back for these dorks AND IT WAS RIIIIIIIIIIGHT WE ALL FELL FOR IT DAMMIT.

I’m not mad about it though tbh like it was fantastic. I didn’t even get fully caught up on the show and I STILL loved it. I feel like every character had a good arc and had their moment to shine, and it was all interwoven in a really lovely way.

I’m bitter that everyone was so quick to accuse Branson about being a political problem again but that’s because he’s my favorite (also can we all collectively mourn the fact that Branson and Mary never got together I just–) but anyway, I digress.

It was so heartwarming and fulfilling and such a lovely, sweet farewell to these amazing characters that captivated me for years and years. I will miss them all so much but I adore where their story ended.

STANDOUT ELEMENT:

THOMAS’S ENTIRE STORYLINE I’M GONNA CRYYYYYYYY

Thomas has always been such a fascinating character and now he got a really good, happy plot and I’m so happy for him?? It was heartbreaking watching him try to “fix” himself near the end of the show and now he’s out here kissing cute boys in the kitchen??? What an icon. I love him.

Also again, Maggie Smith’s final scene at the ball with Mary was absolutely heartbreaking in the best way possible. It was so sweet watching those two connect in such a vulnerable way I’m GONNA CRY AGAIN.

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

Please do absolutely if you are a Downton fan. Please please please. If you aren’t a Downton fan, first of all what are you doing with your life, secondly yeah, okay, maybe this movie isn’t for you.

It’s still good though.

Better female character development than some other movies I could and will mention ruthlessly *cough*ALITABATTLEANGEL*cough*.

All in all, I give Downton Abbey…..

4.5/5 CRYING BOWTIES!!!!!

MINIVIEW 4: THE GOLDFINCH

MY THOUGHTS:

So like, I know this book was a really big thing for a while but uh, I never read it. I don’t know why, I think I was just solely in my YA dystopian fiction phase when it came out and I was just like…meh.

(Tbh I’m still in that phase but it’s more out of spite now because I will defend YA dystopian fiction till my last breath thanks)

So I guess the main thing I’ll say is that wow seeing the movie made me really, really want to read the book.

Overall, the movie is beautifully shot and acted, and wow Ansel Elgort does an amazing, amazing job. I love him in basically anything but that’s beside the point.

Actually like all the acting? Really wonderful.

It’s an interesting, really gritty tale, and I was a little surprised by how much I did like it. But like…I dunno if I would watch it again? At least not until I read the book. Because like, the movie was good. But it just makes me wonder if the book is fantastic.

STANDOUT ELEMENT:

Oh the cinnamontography for sure. That entire scene where our main boy wakes up in the gallery after the bomb is stunning and super eerie and beautifully done.

Also–it’s super gay, y’all. I genuinely don’t care what they’ve said in interviews, it’s gay. That kiss was not platonic. That forehead touch was not platonic. THEY ARE NOT PLATONIC. If you watched that and said “wow, that’s just like me and my friends!” BOY DO I HAVE SOME NEWS FOR YOU.

Also Nicole Kidman is the light of my life, thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

I mean…maybe?? Again, I really really liked it, I just think the book might be better and maybe we should all go read that instead I’m just saying…….

But, if you were on the fence about it or think you do want to see it, I absolutely think you should because it is really good. Also like, I cannot get over how much I thought they were going to end on a really depressing note and I was about to be SO MAD and then WOW that sudden plot-twist turn-around in the last 10 minutes or so was iconic. So that’s another thing: if you’re worried about a depressing ending, it isn’t.

Also I mean if for some reason you’re like “wow my only two options for movies tonight are The Goldfinch and Alita: Battle Angel…” watch The Goldfinch.

All in all, I give The Goldfinch…

3.5/5 PUDGY LITTLE GOLDFINCHES!!!

MINIVIEW 5: THE ADDAMS FAMILY (2019)

MY THOUGHTS:

If you saw the trailers for this and you, like me, were like “oh boy I hope that’s actually good!” DO I HAVE SOME NEWS FOR YOU BECAUSE YES. YES IT IS.

It is absolutely a fun family flick about the best family in the world, and I want to watch it again purely to be able to catch all the dorky little details they threw in because there are so many. You can tell they had so much fun making this and I’m glad, because I had a lot of fun watching it. The animation is a delight, the voice-acting is incredible, THE REMIX OF THE THEME SONG IS ACTUALLY REALLY CUTE, and the message about family and accepting who you really are and how being different is a good thing is super sweet.

So many of the characters had a really fascinating arc and it was fun to watch how those arcs were mirrored in some of the new original characters. Also YOU GET TO SEE MORTICIA AND GOMEZ’S WEDDING AND IT’S RIDICULOUS AND AMAZINGGGG

STANDOUT ELEMENT:

So fun fact: apparently all the character designs for this movie were based on the ORIGINAL designs from the ORIGINAL COMIC STRIP. YEAH. I didn’t even know that there was a comic strip before there was a TV show?? But there is! And the movie designs really look like the comic designs just walked off the page, it’s kind of really impressive.

Also Snoop Dogg voices Cousin Itt I–

ALSO the end credits are shot like the TV opening and the ENTIRE AUDIENCE DID THE SNAPS WHEN IT HAPPENED.

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

Honestly, yeah. I mean if you’re already kind of an Addams fan, I recommend going to see it. It’s super heartfelt and very sweet and fun.

If you just like quirky movies, yes.

If you want a whole lotta bloodshed I mean…uhhhh I’m sure there’s blood somewhere I forgot, I mean, it’s the Addams family.

All in all, I give The Addams Family…

4.5/5 BOMBS!!!

(I was gonna do swords because that’s a big thing but I realized that bombs works much better in honor of Puggsley and his whole character arc about being true to himself. It makes sense, I swear.)

TRAILERS WE HAVEN’T DISCUSSED YET: (I THINK…SOMETIMES I DON’T TOTALLY REMEMBER TBH OH WELL)

Crash course trailers HERE WE GOOOOO

Arctic Dogs is….a movie. That’s uh…really all I can say about this one.

Charlie’s Angels looks super good and I really hope it is good and I cannot WAIT to see itttttt

Last Christmas is a movie I have seen already and BOY are we gonna talk about that one. After I stop crying.

Brittany Runs a Marathon looks like it could be really decent. Or really preachy. Or both.

Ford v Ferrari looks like a real Oscar-bait of a movie but maybe it’s actually good. I dunno. I have such mixed feelings about racing because like I mean eh, also it’s really dangerous, but on the other hand….FAST CARS COOL.

Harriet looks beyond absolutely incredible.

Dark Waters looks so, so good and amazing. Mark Ruffalo is already the love of my life and this story looks incredible. I’m real excited.

Western Stars looks really sweet and uh…yeah.

Just Mercy looks…wow. I have a feeling it does not end happily at all but it looks incredible.

Doctor Sleep…okay look. I love Ewan MacGregor. I would do almost anything for him. EXCEPT see a Stephen King horror movie I will not do that for him I’m sorry Ewan.

Jojo Rabbit looks FANTASTIC and I’m SO EXCITED to see it I am adding Taika Waititi to the list of movie makers who own my soul thanks.

And that does it for the Miniviews!! I really enjoyed this batch of films. This will be in stark contrast to my next planned review because…well I saw Joker. And uh…yeah we’ll get to that.

Yesterday REVIEW

In a drastic genre change from our last film, let’s talk about the Beatles!

So a while ago, I took myself, the fam, and some friends to the movies (okay, technically the friends took themselves and we all met there, but I have to keep up the intro for continuity’s sake) and we saw Yesterday, a movie that answers a question I don’t think any of us even asked: what would happen if literally everyone except maybe like three people just…forgot about the Beatles?

I say this in a gently mocking tone because yeah, the movie’s premise is kind of ridiculous. I mean…what?

But with the exception of the included music by the Beatles, Yesterday is a brand-new story not based on anything except wacky imaginations and for that, it already has a good score in my book.

The rest of the good score it earned by being lovable, fun, heartwarming, thought-provoking, and a damn good time.

So what exactly happens in this movie?

THE PLOT

We start the film by following Jack (Himesh Patel), a “struggling musician” as the IMDB plot refers to him, and I mean yeah, he’s not exactly paying the bills with his music but he’s making time to do something he loves and that’s important, okay?

(This review clearly being written by a struggling artist herself, leave me alone)

Jack is close in particular with his best friend and manager, Ellie (Lily James!!! I love her!!! So much!!!!!). The two of them go around playing less-than-stellar gigs while bantering and being generally adorable.

One night, when Jack is on his way home from a festival, a world-wide blackout occurs and Jack is thrown off his bike by a bus. He wakes up in the hospital with Ellie telling him that while he is okay, he did lose his two front teeth in the fall and therefore people will definitely be laughing at him *shrug emoji*.

At his coming home party, Jack gets a few presents from friends, including a brand-new guitar from Ellie (she!! Is!!! The best!!!!). Jack plays it and sings a snippet of “Yesterday” by the Beatles, of course, but nobody recognizes it. Ellie asks him when he wrote that song, and when Jack says he didn’t…it’s by the Beatles….it’s one of the greatest songs of all time by one of the greatest bands of all time….one of his friends says, hilariously, “well it’s not Coldplay. It’s not ‘Fix You.'”

Jack has somehow woken up in a world where the Beatles never existed (along with a few other things. This is probably one of my favorite elements of the film, as Jack keeps discovering things that are now nonexistent–Coca-Cola, cigarettes, Harry Potter, so on and so forth). So now…I mean, what does he do? He’s been presented with a golden opportunity: he is the only person (so it seems) who knows all these incredible songs, and he’s always wanted to be a famous musician…

Or has he? As Jack becomes more famous with these “stolen” songs, he learns more and more what fame is really like, and he’s not sure it’s all it’s cracked up to be–especially when it costs him his best friend and the love of his life.

THE REVIEW

Y’ALL.

Because the premise is genuinely just so…huh? I wasn’t entirely sure what to expect going into this film, and I was beyond pleasantly surprised. Yesterday has so much going for it, and it touches on so many things without ever becoming overwhelming or like, bad, in any way.

It’s been getting less-than-favorable reviews from what I’ve seen, which is a shame if you’re someone who only sees movies based off of what famous reviewers say. Like…listen, I love and support most of my fellow critics, but I think in the case of this movie, we all need to chill out a little.

Here’s Hollywood giving us a dorky, original storyline and y’all are like…”IT’S A BEATLES MOVIE WITHOUT THE BEATLES!!!” Like…..duh? That’s…that’s the point?? What…what did you expect??? I…I have concerns.

One review complained that the movie focused too much on Jack and not enough on Ellie, that it pushed women to the side too much. And to be fair, this movie could have had a female protagonist and nothing would have changed, I don’t think. But can we take a breath and appreciate that the movie has a POC protagonist? And that’s never presented as anything other than completely normal? Also–mixed-race romantic relationship?? ANYONE???

Look, we all have things that push us over the edge when it comes to movies. I mean…just look at my Toy Story 4 review. I get it and I admit I have that, too! But I think we need to calm down and stop cancelling things entirely just because they don’t have one thing that we think is important.

I mean, I can’t help you if your main complaint is that the Beatles weren’t in this movie because…I…that’s the whole…plot? But if your complaint is about women being pushed aside (she’s?? A major character??) or something of the like, let’s appreciate things the movie does right–because if we cancel everything that comes out of Hollywood because it doesn’t have all representation at all times, we’ll never get anything. It’s a sucky fact, but there it is.

The point is, this movie has so much to offer and I think everyone should give it a chance. If you’re still skeptical (WHERE?? ARE THE BEATLES??????) then let’s take a journey to an alternate universe together and dissect what exactly it is that makes this movie such a unique gem.

Spoiler warning is now in effect!!

THE MUSIC

Most of the music is, in fact, songs by the Beatles so we know it is, just as the movie says, great. Even my dad who admits to not being the biggest Beatles fan (please don’t come after him, it’s not his fault) still liked the movie and how it presented everything.

I guess the major complaint people have is that the songs were not played in their entirety, or something.

Which…um…I don’t know how to tell you this…this is…this is a movie? It’s….it’s not a concert? It never marketed itself as a movie musical that would feature full-length songs? And, dare I say it, the songs aren’t actually the point?

I mean, I do get it. Both Bohemian Rhapsody and Rocketman featured mostly full-length if not full-length versions of the songs we know and love, but the difference is that Bohemian Rhapsody and Rocketman were both marketed as biopics about those artists. Yesterday isn’t a biopic, it’s a quirky movie that happens to involve a plot point that uses songs by the Beatles. Did we all get this offended when Across the Universe came out??

I mean…maybe we did, I was in middle school when that movie came out and I wasn’t really down with the movie scene times.

The fact is, any time a project uses someone or something well-known and loved that has a cult following, people are going to jump on it and call it imperfect no matter what–it’s just the nature of the beast. There have been bad reviews for Bohemian Rhapsody, Rocketman, and now Yesterday because Queen, Elton John, and the Beatles are all beloved icons and everyone has an opinion about how their stories should be represented, and there’s just no way to please everyone. We’re all very picky people, unfortunately.

Now, I get wanting a biopic about the Beatles–and that’s great! But that’s not what this movie is, so maybe we all need to take a step back and stop criticizing it for something it’s not.

I have read that some people seem to be miffed because Himesh Patel sings the songs and not…the Beatles themselves, but again that’s…that’s the point? The fact that he’s singing songs that aren’t actually his is the entire plot of the movie.

All this to say, look–the music itself is the Beatles (with fun cameo songs by Ed Sheeran!) so it’s great, and it’s all sung by Himesh Patel (Lily James helps a little in the beginning) and it’s good!

All of the little instrumental interludes written by Daniel Pemberton are also great.

THE CHARACTERS

As I’ve said before, I personally can’t get behind a film if I don’t love the characters, and this movie is great at presenting a plethora of characters to love…even when they’re idiots sometimes.

Jack, our main man, is fantastic. He fits the struggling artist bill perfectly, and I didn’t find him unlikeable in any way. Is he a bit dense? For sure! But you can see why Ellie’s been in love with him forever. He’s charming, quirky, a complete dork, filled with anxiety…he’s great millennial representation, basically. Even when he gets famous and starts being really stupid, you just get the feeling that he’s overwhelmed and truly doesn’t know how to handle it all (plus he’s constantly plagued by the fact that the songs that made him famous are not his own lol #rip). In my opinion, Jack is a great protagonist to follow–this is a tricky story, because again, the Beatles are beyond beloved for the modern audience, and to have a character just steal all their songs and get famous off it is like, a crime against passion and art and beauty or whatever!!! But Jack is genuinely sympathetic. He’s a mess of a human being, and really, wouldn’t we all do the same if we were in his shoes?

(Don’t try to be all high and mighty and say you wouldn’t.)

Jack knows that the Beatles are beloved and are considered musical geniuses and icons–he says as much every time he gets interrupted when playing one of their songs. He gets the indignity of the entire situation, but he also sees an opportunity, one he’s waited for his entire life…Can we blame him, really? Plus it makes him all the more lovable when he gives the Beatles credit near the end and puts out all their songs for free for everyone. What a guy!

Ellie is perfection personified.

…alright maybe I’m biased because I’m genuinely in love with Lily James, but I really, really like Ellie as a character. Am I also biased because I, too, have been in love with an idiot for years only for it to lead to nothing because he is, in fact, an idiot? Yeah, probably. But listen–all that aside, Ellie is still just…she’s great. She’s cute, she’s confident, she’s fun, she’s supportive and smart, she’s everything Jack could want but he’s too much of an idiot to see it!! I think Ellie’s arc is really beautiful and really well done. She’s been sidelined by Jack for years, and when he continues to do that to her, she’s the one who says enough is enough, I’m tired of this, I love you but I’m moving on. She pursues a relationship with a guy who actually treats her like the goddess she is. She’s the one who stops the potential tryst with Jack in the hotel because she knows him, she knows he won’t pick her over his music. Ellie is incredibly strong and a great backbone for the movie.

Because the film is primarily a character drama focused on Ellie and Jack, the other characters don’t really mean as much. I mean, don’t get me wrong, Ed Sheeran playing himself is fantastic, and he does great. I mean he had to say “why not change the title of the iconic Beatles song Hey, Jude to Hey, Dude” with a straight face. Amazing. Iconic. 11/10.

Kate McKinnon shines as the evil, money-obsessed producer/manager that kind of answers the question “what if fame had gotten to Ellie like it did to Jack?” And it’s fantastic. She’s playing a caricature because that’s what her character is, and let’s be real, that’s what McKinnon really shines at.

Jack has a friend who steps in as manager on tour and I do not remember his name and I feel bad, but he was funny.

THE QUESTION

I will now attempt to dive deeper into all the various themes the movie covered, but again, I really think you have to see this one for yourself to fully grasp it all, because it tackles a lot in its 116-minute runtime.

So the most obvious question that even the trailer brought up: is it the music that makes the person famous, or is it the personality behind the music that brings the fame? The movie tackles this question in kind of an interesting way, and they just happen to do it with one of the most beloved bands of all time.

(How many times have I described the Beatles as “beloved” already? Is someone tallying?)

The movie suggests that it’s the music itself that is the pull, that it’s the music that is the important thing. Jack became incredibly famous as a solo artist singing songs by the Beatles. His personality didn’t matter–it was all thanks to the music. We see how much of a failure Jack was with his own songs, and it wasn’t until he started performing Beatles songs that he got noticed, got an album recorded, got noticed by Ed Sheeran, so on and so forth.

We live in kind of an unfortunate time right now, where artists and creators we love and claim to know are being accused of horrific things left and right. We’re left behind with the work they created and we have to ask ourselves…can I still enjoy this thing? Am I able to separate the creator from the creation?

Yesterday suggests that this is not only possible, but important. While a piece of the creator is always attached to whatever the creation is, it’s crucial to realize that there is something enjoyable and beautiful in the creation itself.

After Jack admits he stole all the songs and releases them for free, we see him teaching “Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da” to a bunch of students who are having the time of their lives. It suggests that even though Jack smothered his own name and became known as a fraud, the songs themselves remained popular and important to the culture as a whole. The world separated Jack from the music because it had to, he didn’t really give them a choice, and enjoyment could still be found.

Is this even a point the movie was trying to make? Eh, maybe not. But it’s something you can definitely glean from it, and it’s a question we have to tackle as more and more creators get famous.

We cannot idolize anyone because nobody is perfect, but that does not mean that we cannot find something beautiful in what they give us.

THE FAME

Every time another news story breaks about another Hollywood star going to rehab, or killing someone, or just being a general complete mess, my mom and I love to discuss fame as a whole. Specifically, her favorite question is this: do we naturally idolize messed-up people, or does fame take nice people and mess them up?

Yesterday suggests, thankfully, that fame tends to mess up nice people. While Jack certainly doesn’t begin perfect, he’s a nice enough person and thankful for what he has. But he’s always craved fame, and once he gets it, it absolutely destroys him and the most important relationship in his life: Ellie.

Being constantly fawned over, obsessed over, talked about, it all so easily went to his head that by the time he realized that wasn’t actually what he wanted and he wasn’t even happy? It was too late.

Every time something bad comes out about an artist we’re particularly fond of, we’re all Ellie. We think we know them, we praise them, we love them, and then suddenly, they’re not who we thought they were at all. It’s a personal blow (it actually is to Ellie because she does actually know Jack, but it feels like a personal blow to us because we feel like we actually know them).

It’s established early on that all Jack wants is to be a famous musician because he’s convinced that will make him happy. Anyone who’s ever wanted to be famous for something understands that, because the glorification of fame and famous people convinces us that that will make us happy. But when he does have all that stuff? He’s miserable.

I do think that it may have been different if he’d gotten famous off his own work rather than stolen work, because then the guilt wouldn’t have been at play as much, but the fact remains: he was still doing what he loved, and he wasn’t happy.

This all comes to a head in a really beautiful scene where Jack goes to the home of, wait for it, JOHN LENNON (played wonderfully by Rumplestiltskin himself, Robert Carlyle). Because the Beatles never existed in this alternate timeline/universe/whatever, Lennon was never famous. Instead, he spends his days in his quiet beach house, painting. Jack and Lennon have a real low key, sweet conversation about happiness. When Jack sees that Lennon is truly happy, even though he doesn’t even know what he’s missing out on in the timeline/universe/whatever where he is a Beatle and all, Jack gets it. He gets what he’s been missing out on, too.

He admits he’s a fraud. He gives away all the Beatles songs for free. He runs off with Ellie into the sunset. He becomes, I’m assuming, a music teacher. He and Ellie have kids. He’s truly and genuinely happy for…pretty much the first time the entire film.

Now, of course, I’m sure there are celebrities who are perfectly nice and wonderful and are actually happy, but…we don’t know that, do we? We don’t know anything about them except for the face they show us.

No one in the film, really aside from Ellie, knew Jack at all. They continued to not like any of the songs he actually wrote, only becoming obsessed with the Beatles songs. And that messed him up.

THE ROMANCE

So remember how in my really snarky Toy Story 4 review, I was real miffed about how the trailers really highlighted Gabby and especially Forky as key characters, and then that wasn’t really the case and it was something else entirely? A romantic drama movie masquerading as something else?

Yesterday did the complete opposite–this movie advertised as a funky little story about nobody remembering the Beatles, and then SURPRISE it’s actually?? A romance???

I mean Ellie was heavily featured in a lot of the promotional art, but I just?? Wasn’t expecting this???

What’s beautiful about the romance in Yesterday is that it actually serves a purpose. It’s a crucial part of the plot for Jack to realize how he feels about Ellie because that helps him realize what actually makes him happy and what he actually wants out of life–it completes his arc.

As cynical as I was about the romance over friendship arcs featured in How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World, Avengers: Endgame, and Toy Story 4, I loved the choices made in this film to feature a romance. Like I’ve said–I’m a huge sucker for a good romantic plot when it’s done well.

What’s especially nice here is that I think it is done well. There was never a question of romance vs. friendship because it’s established from the beginning that Ellie and Jack are best friends for life first. It was developed in such a way that we knew and supported both of these characters. We weren’t robbed at all because we didn’t have to watch Jack say goodbye to his friends and run off into the sunset with some girl who got 20 minutes of screentime. Ellie and Jack have a great love story that is everything we should want–they’re best friends as well as romantic partners. And it makes sense to root for them.

It’s even realistic in that Ellie pines for him, Jack is an idiot, Ellie tells him, Jack is an idiot, they kiss but Ellie stops it going further, Jack is an idiot, Jack goes to stop her from leaving and she’s hopeful for a moment, but then Jack is an idiot, Ellie tries to move on with someone who actually thinks of her that way, Jack is an idiot, so on and so forth. I do think that a story could have been told without all the romantic drama, but it couldn’t be the same one. Ellie and Jack are so much more than romantic partners–they’re just partners. They’re best friends and soulmates. The drama is crucial for Jack to realize what it is he really wants and what it is that will actually make him happy in life.

Say what you will about cliches and romance being unnecessary, I get it. But I don’t think you could have told the same story without it. Ellie and Jack are both flawed, likable characters, and their relationship is a joy to watch from start to finish.

THE ENDING

In a time where happy endings and happy characters are not allowed in tv shows, it was like a true breath of fresh air to watch Yesterday. Jack abandons everything he thought would make him happy to embrace what truly does. He finds meaning in the people and music in his life. He knows just how soul-sucking fame can be, so he’s all the more grateful and appreciative of what he has as a teacher. He and Ellie marry, have a family, and most importantly, have each other. Jack’s picture perfect happy ending isn’t the happy ending for everyone–marriage and romance isn’t as important to some people as it is to others. But what we should focus on taking away from the ending is that finding and focusing on whatever makes you truly happy is worth more than anything.

In kind of a funny twist, the timeline never gets fixed. Or explained. Why did Jack and two other random people get transported to an alternate world where the Beatles never existed? *shrug emoji*

Why do Coca-cola, cigarettes, and Harry Potter also not exist in this world? *shrug emoji*

What…happened? *shrug emoji*

I dunno. Maybe in another timeline, I’m really pissed off about that never being explained, but here? I don’t really mind it all that much. It suggests that there’s a version of the world where everything can work out, where you can pursue happiness and actually find it…and I like that. So maybe on my own bad days, I can focus on the idea that somewhere, somehow, some version of myself is doing just fine.

Is that reading too much into it? Probably.

But I prefer movies that make me think about stuff like that, instead of stuff like “why did the dog have to get killed there was literally no reason for that also why did she paint dog blood on her face why is she like this.”

*cough*ALITABATTLEANGEL*cough*

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

This is one of those movies where I completely understand if it isn’t for you. It’s weird. It’s quirky. THEY DON’T PLAY THE FULL-LENGTH VERSIONS OF BEATLES SONGS!!! NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

But I think if you give it a chance, you may just really enjoy it.

Or not. I don’t know you, I don’t know your life.

This movie is refreshing. It’s an original, zany idea, with good characters, and lots to think about. It’s funny. It’s ridiculous. It’s over-the-top.

Ed Sheeran is incredibly self-aware and it’s a little frightening, but good.

The scene with Robert Carlyle as John Lennon will probably make you cry.

It’s just…it’s unique. And I think Hollywood needs that right now.

Overall, I give Yesterday

5/5 BEETLES!!!

I tried to make them look cute and appealing but they kind of just look like they want to steal your soul. just like fame wants to steal your soul.

Lily James’s outfits make up one whole beetle of that rating. Lily James herself makes up another whole beetle. Lily James is a delight, okay?

FAVORITE MOMENT:

I have?? So many??

But there’s something about that John Lennon beach house scene. It’s beautifully shot and delightful. There’s also something to be said for the scene where the only other two people who remember the Beatles confront Jack but it’s only to thank him because they miss the Beatles’ music and neither of them can sing.

“OOF” MOMENT:

When Jack left Ellie in the diner. You fool!!! Imbecile!!!! THAT WAS YOUR CHANCE YOU ABSOLUTE MONGOOSE.

Nothing against mongoose (mongeese?).

TRAILERS TO WATCH OUT FOR:

So we start off with The Peanut Butter Falcon which looks like it might be really super good but also could potentially be really super depressing and emotionally draining and I just have to prep for that.

Ad Astra just gets more confusing every time I see a new trailer for it. What is it about? What is happening? Space????

The Goldfinch looks absolutely incredible. I never read the book, but now I really want to. I hope it’s good.

And that about does it for this review! If you are looking for a night of escapism to a quirky, feel-good world with good characters and have I mentioned Lily James, I definitely recommend you check out Yesterday.

Toy Story 4 REVIEW

It’s cute how this poster lies to you by making you think all these characters are actually super important in the movie

So, a while ago, (in my defense–it was Shark Week) I took myself and the fam to the movies, and we saw Toy Story 4.

Which is…a film.

I will freely admit that although I tried to go in without any expectations, I still had a lot. I mean, it’s PIXAR. And…it’s Toy Story.

So while it’s safe to say that it’s certainly a well-done movie, I just…I have feelings about it.

THE PLOT

We pick up right where we left off in Toy Story 3, with all of Andy’s toys now belonging to Bonnie, and–

…wait, we don’t do that?

Oh…okay.

We ACTUALLY pick up in a sort of flashback. It was briefly mentioned in Toy Story 3 that somehow, our favorite group of ragtag toys lost Bo Peep sometime during the years when Andy was growing up. While it’s certainly sad, I mean Woody and Bo were like…aw, she’s not the only toy they’ve lost over the years. Again, while it’s sad, it’s something they’ve dealt with before, but the important thing is that they all stuck together because they are each other’s family.

Oh, jeez, I’m sorry, I’m going on and on about the consistent message the past three films were giving us, about the importance of finding who you are based off of the people who care about you and not what society tells you, about overcoming sadness and heartbreak by facing it and moving forward with your family who loves you because you’re never alone in anything, about how found family is just as powerful if not more so, about how friendship can always win…

Anyway, Toy Story 4 basically answers the question none of us asked: why is it that these movies are so focused on friendship when we all know romance is the TRUE superpower??

…plot. Yes. We’re talking about plot.

Andy’s younger sister Molly grew tired of her Bo Peep lamp, so the family decided to give her away (I initially assumed to some sort of collector, but it sounds like she did go to another family with a kid first before ending up in the antiques shop). After performing a daring rescue to save RC Car from the gutter during the rainstorm, Woody heads back outside to save Bo Peep as well.

Bo gently points out that she’s not Andy’s toy, so there’s no need for him to try and keep them all together or something like that. So Bo and Woody have a heartfelt goodbye in the rain, Andy freaks when he realizes Woody is outside somehow, and life goes on.

Now we finally catch up to where we left off perfectly in Toy Story 3. All our favorite toys now belong to Bonnie, and life carries on as usual. The only problem is, Bonnie never actually plays with Woody, and she leaves him in the closet all the time.

This gives Woody a bit of an identity crisis because, I mean, he’s a toy!! He should be played with!!! He’s the leader!!!! So he breaks all the rules and sneaks inside Bonnie’s bag to accompany her to kindergarten. Bonnie is, heart-achingly, scared of kindergarten and doesn’t want to go. She’s shy and doesn’t easily make friends, and when she tries to, her art supplies get thrown out. Woody sees this and magically gets the art supplies back on her table. Bonnie, now determined, makes herself a friend: Forky.

(Sidenote: it drives me crazy that Forky is actually a spork. I know that’s part of the joke, but like…he refers to himself as a spork…other characters refer to him as a spork…JUST CALL HIM SPORKY. You’re telling me Bonnie didn’t know what the difference was between a fork and a spork?? I learned that when I was younger than Bonnie and it was my favorite fact in the world. Anyway. Back to the plot.)

Forky is a little, uh…he’s a little lost. He keeps trying to throw himself away because…I mean he’s a plastic spork, but Woody won’t let him. He tells everyone that Forky is “the most important toy to Bonnie right now” so he has to protect him.

Bonnie’s family ends up going on a road trip, and of course, Forky escapes on the road. Woody jumps out of the RV to go find him and bring him back, and then they get side-tracked because Woody sees what he thinks is Bo’s lamp in the window of an antiques shop. This is where they meet Gabby Gabby and her weird army of silent puppet minions, and also where, yes, you guessed it, Woody and Bo are reunited.

The adventure unfolds, new friends are made, and while Woody’s consistent goal is to get back to Bonnie, he has to keep asking himself…does he really want to?

(Yes. Well, the old Woody would. I don’t know this new guy.)

THE REVIEW

OKAY, now that the plot’s out of the way, I get to be as snarky as I want to.

I really wanted to like this movie.

I always have high expectations with Pixar, and even though I’m not the biggest fan of sequels (and Pixar has certainly had some less-than-stellar sequels…lookin’ at you, Finding Dory and Cars 2…), I’ve loved all of the Toy Story movies. In fact, as I was ruminating on what I would say about this movie, I realized that the second Toy Story is actually my favorite of the bunch!

What I appreciated is that every addition to the Toy Story franchise brought something new that added to the world and the characters and almost never felt redundant or unnecessary–the first is about coming to terms with being a toy and learning how to deal with not being a favorite anymore, the second is about second chances and trust and also about legacies vs. friendship, and the third is all about growing up, change, and facing hardships together.

None of the major plot points in Toy Story 4 are new, with the exception of Forky’s creation, which just brings about so many questions about how inanimate objects even work in this universe. Even then, Forky’s entire plot line is thrown to the curb not even halfway through the film, because despite the advertising, he’s not the main focus of the story at all–Bo Peep is.

Look–I could go on and on, and trust me, I will. While I certainly have nitpicks as well as just general overall problems with the film, I still will say that it’s a good movie. It just is. It’s absolutely gorgeous, for starters, and some of the new characters are delightful additions to the franchise (Ducky, Bunny, and Gabby in particular). I still cried like a baby during the entire last act. I still liked it.

That doesn’t change the fact that I left feeling disappointed. And I know, because I’ve said it in many of my reviews, that not all movies are for everyone. That’s one of the most beautiful things about cinema as a whole–there are so many options, there’s bound to be something for everyone. Just because I, and a very select few others, were disappointed with the film and have some issues, doesn’t mean everyone feels the same way. Lots of people loved the film and were so happy for Woody and Bo, and that’s great.

I guess what hurts is that I grew up with this franchise and these characters. I got used to seeing Pixar as a studio that, ultimately, could make stories that mostly everyone could enjoy. I got used to this franchise that stuck to its main theme of friendship being so much more powerful and important than we are normally taught it is. I got used to this weird sense of entitlement with these stories, and I get that these movies are not for me.

It’s just…it always felt like they were.

So what is it exactly that set this movie apart in such a weirdly negative way?

If you’re still with me, let’s charge ahead!

WHO’S READY TO OVERANALYZE A KIDS’ MOVIE????

THE ART

Like I mentioned previously, this is a gorgeous movie. It just is. The animation is just…it’s jaw-dropping. And the attention to detail? Just ridiculous. Pixar goes above and beyond to make this a beautiful experience if nothing else, so credit where credit is due: those animators and those artists deserve so much love and attention for their work on this film. It’s so detailed and realistic it’s sometimes hard to remember that this is supposed to be a kids’ film and an animated movie…

I…yeah. I mean the only way to really appreciate it all is to go and see the film for yourself. Despite my personal feelings about the rest of it, I do genuinely think it’s worth seeing for the art alone.

The music is, for the most part, delightful. Again, it’s Toy Story, it’s Randy Newman, it’s wonderful.

…with the exception of the re-use of the classic theme “You’ve Got a Friend in Me,” but we’ll get to my beef with that later.

Don’t get attached to any of these lovable friends, they’re barely in the movie

THE CHARACTERS

…let’s start with the new characters before I get into…other things.

Forky is a precious summer child and I love him. All the jokes about him being the perfect representation for people finally because…he’s trash (and so are we all) are hilarious. He’s adorably naive about everything since he’s only been alive for a couple days, but I don’t think it ever gets annoying at all. He vexes Woody, sure, but it’s more adorable than obnoxious. Once he understands Bonnie’s attachment to him and how important he is, his determination to get back to her is super sweet. We only experience a portion of it because, again, despite all advertisement he is not the focus of the film, but I digress.

Ducky and Bunny are a pair I was convinced would be annoying, kind of like the little alien in MIB: International, but they were surprisingly lovable. The various “plush rush” jokes were fantastic, and the fact that their “hands” were sewn together and therefore they constantly had to move like that was super great. My main quip with them is that they were introduced with this whole plot line of “we’re mad at Buzz because he ruined our chances to be won as a prize and go home with a kid!” And then it was just suddenly dropped in favor of the whole Bo x Woody thing. Like, whoops, my bad, I thought we were playing by the previous Toy Story rules of “everyone joins our found family group” haha SILLY ME.

Gabby Gabby is by far my favorite part of this film. I mean she was heavily advertised as the villain, and they do present her and her minions that way. When we learn about her from Bo’s point of view, we accept she is the villain. What’s fascinating about Gabby is that she’s just like every other toy (except for Bo): she just wants a kid. In fact, she has her heart set on one kid in particular, and when we learn this about her, it only makes her more endearing. It is genuinely heartbreaking when she is rejected by the shop owner’s granddaughter. We are genuinely happy for her when she gets to go home with the girl who was lost at the fair. Hers is the one plot line I would say is genuinely unique (besides Forky’s, perhaps) and even then, there’s some overlap. Anyway, I love Gabby and I wish her the best of the best.

Bo Peep is by far the star of the film, and that’s fine. She was never my favorite toy from the previous films, but I’m not holding that against her. I like the idea of her making a comeback (though I still think it’s an unnecessary storyline since Woody had definitely moved on from her, but we’re apparently getting rid of everything the past films taught us anyway so moving on) and having changed into a sort of kick-ass vigilante type. To give credit where it’s due, Bo’s transformation to lost toy was very believable and effective, and I think it suits her character well. I do believe that despite her strength during their flashback goodbye, she would definitely still have feelings about Woody and would miss him. They were great friends and inferred great loves. That’s all fine.

What’s not fine is Woody, but I think I need an entirely different section for that.

I can’t even talk about any of the other characters because they don’t get enough screen time to justify it. Keanu Reeves voices a Canadian stuntman doll who’s a great source of comedic relief, but that’s about it.

THE WOODY PROBLEM

How do I put this without sounding like a complaining child…I honestly don’t know if I can. This is a kids’ film after all, and continuity and great characterization are generally low on the list because it’s just for kids after all, who expects that?

But the problem is that Pixar built an entire foundation on getting us to expect things like that. Each previous Toy Story sequel took what was already good about the previous film and built on it. This film knocked over the entire tower.

Woody has always been a fun protagonist in the sense that he’s not perfect–far from it! The films don’t shy away from that. He’s selfish, easily jealous, passionate to a fault, an unrealistic dreamer, and sometimes just a flat-out jerk. It was always refreshing, then, to see him grow and change with every film. In the beginning, he had to wrestle with the idea of being replaced (or at least not being the favorite anymore), something we can all relate to. Then he had to struggle with choosing fame and legacy over friends and family (admittedly, not something that’s as easy to relate to, but somehow the film still presented the struggle in a sympathetic light). Then he had to struggle with the massive change that comes with growing up, and even at one point, coming to terms with death (something we all will have to relate to at some point). While Woody was always presented as the protagonist, he never dealt with anything alone. These films always pushed friendship and found family above all else, which has always been an incredibly refreshing take.

Woody learned how to make peace with not being the favorite toy, he learned how to show compassion for and learn about someone he initially didn’t like, he learned how to come to terms with a legacy that can easily overshadow him and take him away from what’s important, he learned that family and friends who fight for you no matter what are more important than anything, he learned that dealing with loss is a fact of life but one you never, ever have to face alone, he learned that sometimes the people who seem the nicest hide the cruelest intentions, he learned that life goes on even when we lose people, even when they grow and change…

And we learned all those things with him.

This is why it felt wrong for Woody to fall back into old habits from the first movie and suddenly be jealous about not being the favorite toy again. This is why it felt wrong for Woody to so easily and without question abandon the friends and family he’d sworn over and over again to fight for and be present for. This is why it felt so wrong for him to just choose romance over lifelong friends and family.

Rather than moving forward with the beautifully and intricately weaved plot over the years, this movie felt like it took 17 steps backwards, or even just created an alternate universe entirely. While the lost toy plot and choice is an interesting one, it’s a story that didn’t have to be Woody’s. Woody’s story was so neatly wrapped up in Toy Story 3 that it didn’t need all this extra out-of-character fluff. Give the plot line to RC Car–maybe the trauma of the rain gutter rescue really got to them and they decide they want to go around saving other toys or helping them so they never feel the way RC Car did. It would develop a character that we hardly heard anything from in this movie, but still be a good story about family and friendship.

Speaking of…

THE ENSEMBLE PROBLEM

It’s rare to find a series that does such a good job as a true ensemble piece. Sure, Woody and Buzz are in essence the “lead characters,” but we know and love the other characters just as much as them because they are all just as developed. We love Rex, Jessie, Bullseye, Slinky, Mr. and Mrs. Potato Head, Sarge and the guys, RC Car, Hamm, and all the rest of them just as much as our two leads because they also get screen time.

This was an element that, although blatantly present in all past installments, was blatantly absent in this film. So much emphasis was put on Woody and Bo and all of…that, that the rest of the ensemble (WHOM WE ALSO KNOW AND LOVE) got barely any screen time.

It felt hollow when Woody said goodbye to Buzz and the gang because we’d hardly seen them that film, just as Woody had hardly seen them. Rather than being thrilled to be united with them again (LIKE THE REAL WOODY WOULD HAVE BEEN), he had very little trouble just leaving them. Forever. It’s like….I mean….WHAT.

It’s called Toy Story. Not Woody Story. And I get that Pixar has had some major staffing renovations or whatever, I don’t follow drama if I can help it because then I just get sad *cough*THEMAGICIANS*cough*, but…this just felt way out of left field. For a series that used to preach on and on about how important and powerful friendship is, this just felt like a punch in the gut and in the childhood. And me and like, maybe two other people didn’t appreciate it.

THE ROMANCE PROBLEM

Now, listen. LISTEN.

I am a huge romantic. I fully admit and embrace this. Proposal videos make me cry. A sweet, well-executed romantic moment in a show, movie, or book will also make me cry. The scene in Ever After when Henry comes to save Danielle and calls her by her true name for the first time makes me SOB. EVERY. DAMN. TIME.

And maybe it’s because moving to a new state and losing a lot of really good friendships will do this to you, but I’ve grown to appreciate good depictions of healthy friendships just as much as healthy romance. It’s why I’ve grown to love series like Toy Story even more as the years go by (yeah, I know, “shut up ya 22-year-old millennial”).

While I can appreciate the sweet relationship that Bo and Woody have, I don’t prefer it to the friendships by any means. As cute as they are, Bo and Woody had barely any screen time and development over the course of the series compared to Woody and Buzz, Woody and Jessie, Woody and Andy, Woody and…literally almost anyone else. While I can believe that Woody would be nostalgic for Bo and what could have been, I can’t believe that he would abandon his family for her.

For some reason, 2019 seems to be the year of media friendships being literally shoved aside and tossed into the fires of “who cares I guess” to make room for romance that like…okay, I guess.

How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World was the first example of this that I can think of, and even though I praised the film for its depiction and inclusion of the realism of life or whatever then, I’m rethinking my stance a little. A great friendship was still ruined in favor of romance, and the Light Fury was even less-developed than Bo Peep. I do appreciate, however, that the reasoning behind the choice was at least well-thought-out. It wasn’t really a conscious choice on anyone’s part–it was presented as the unfortunate reality of the world they lived in. The only way to stay truly safe was to separate. Does it still suck and am I still a little bitter about it, looking back? Yeah. 100%.

Then we had Avengers: Endgame. I dunno if they were just trying to appease all their older, comic-book-loving white guy fans (assuming they cared about appeasing the fans at all #burn), but there is something genuinely wrong with the way Steve just up and abandoned Bucky and Sam. This is a case that I think is a lot more similar to the Toy Story situation than HTTYD is. Even though Steve was shown to fight for Bucky and Sam (but like, especially Bucky) and their friendship in movie after movie, for some reason, the first chance he gets to time travel, he goes back and stays with Peggy. Now don’t get me wrong, Peggy is great and I love her, but Steve had canonically moved on. Was it still sad? Absolutely. But Steve had great friends and family to surround himself with, and then suddenly he just noped out of there without even explaining to his so-called friends what he was doing. It, too, felt like a punch in the gut because it’s almost like it was saying (since he is Captain America after all) “the true American dream is getting married and living out a romance, forget all those friendships you have, they don’t matter.”

And it’s not just movies pushing this romance-over-friendship narrative–TV shows have been guilty of it this year as well (although some shows seem to be taking the complete opposite road and just not giving anyone any happiness ever because it’s “subversive” or whatever). I don’t know what is in the air this year, but I don’t like it.

Look–romance is fine. Romance is GREAT. When done well, it can absolutely serve as a tremendous plot point that both adds to the story and the overall narrative (as we will discuss in the movie Yesterday, coming soon to a blog near you!). But the narrative point of Toy Story has always, always, been friendship. I mean, even when they brought in Jessie, a perfect female counterpart to Woody, they didn’t force the two together. Sure, Woody already had Bo Peep here, but that’s not the point. The point is that they created a perfect partner for Woody, it was a perfect setup for romance…and they didn’t go that route. She’s his partner alright…HIS PARTNER IN CRIME.

Woody helped Jessie heal from her past trauma and found her a family and a kid to give her a new purpose, while fully realizing that he is an essential part of that family, too.

And yeah, Jessie and Buzz get all romanced in Toy Story 3, but that’s still not the point of the movie. Just as Woody and Bo have never before been the center plot, Jessie and Buzz weren’t either. The scene we all remember from the third movie is when they all hold hands and stay together, resigned to their fate in the incinerator. The message there isn’t romance above all–it’s friendship. It’s family.

There is nothing wrong with romance…except when it overshadows the point.

This is why I’m upset with them using the classic “You’ve Got a Friend in Me” song. That’s a friendship song. That’s Woody and Buzz’s song. You don’t get to use that song if you focus on romance the whole time and tear apart the two best friends that the song IS ABOUT. THAT’S RUDE.

THE THEME PROBLEM

So what is the theme of Toy Story 4?

….anyone?

Anyone?

Yeah.

You could argue that it’s all about finding your purpose, and I’d be inclined to agree with you, except then I’d say “but that was also tied into Woody’s character arc in the first movie, Jessie’s arc in the second, and the whole group’s arc in the third. It’s an arc that was so satisfyingly fulfilled at the end of the third movie, it’s beyond beating a dead horse in this movie (sorry Bullseye).” Can it still be the movie’s theme? Yeah, sure–when it comes to Gabby and Forky. But again, they’re not what this movie is about (even though the trailers would have you believe otherwise and YES, I WILL KEEP COMPLAINING ABOUT THAT).

You could argue that it’s about friendship, like all the films have been! After all, Woody made new friends and made it his life’s purpose to help other toys find friendship. Great! Except then I’d tell you, “how on EARTH can you argue this movie is about friendship when Woody said goodbye to not only his best friends in the world (not that you could tell from how much damn screen time they got in this movie, i.e., PRACTICALLY NONE) but also Buzz?? BUZZ FREAKIN LIGHTYEAR, HIS PERFECT FOIL, HIS PARTNER, HIS BEST BEST FRIEND, HIS GOOD BUDDY WHO HAS CHASED HIM DOWN AND TALKED SENSE INTO HIM AND BROUGHT HIM BACK HOME TIME AND TIME AGAIN?? Yeah. Yeah this movie is really aaaaaallllll about friendship. Right.”

You could argue that who the hell even cares, it’s a kids’ movie, and it’s not like it’s a bad kids’ movie, stop overanalyzing it. To which I’d say “yeah, I get it. Believe me. EXCEPT YOU CAN’T SERIOUSLY EXPECT ME TO OVERLOOK THAT WHEN THEME HAS PLAYED SUCH A CENTRAL ROLE IN EVERY DAMN TOY STORY MOVIE UP UNTIL NOW. YA CAN’T JUST RAISE THE BAR SUPER HIGH AND THEN BE SHOCKED WHEN I THEN GET UPSET BECAUSE THE BAR BARELY GOT OFF THE GROUND WITH THIS MOVIE.”

Or, you could argue that the theme of the movie is, of course, romance. It’s a perfect “ending” where Woody bids farewell to the family and friends he claims are most important to him (just like we’re supposed to do, we should be saying goodbye to these characters just like Woody is, real freakin’ subtle Pixar LEAVE MY CHILDHOOD ALONE) to spend the rest of his days uniting toys and kids with a romance he had already gotten over just like we had. Don’t we all feel fulfilled???

No.

But that’s the theme. That’s the winner. It’s a romantic drama that masqueraded as a family fun adventure film with a focus on friendship and love saving the day. First of all, rude. Second of all, RUDE.

Yes pls leave and bring back the true Woody, thanks

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

Look. I know, okay? I get it.

It’s a kids’ movie. I’m not the target audience (even if I did grow up with these characters). It’s not meant to be graded as anything other than a movie for children about talking toys. I do understand that, believe it or not.

And even though I think the previous films form a perfect trilogy that really set the stage for what family films can be, and that this one doesn’t even come close to the same league as the other three, I can’t deny that it’s still a good film.

It’s gorgeous. It’s funny. It’s heartbreaking. It’s meaningful.

And if you’re not as offended by continuity errors and the whole cash-grab-esque nature of it all like I am, you’ll probably love it.

Trying to explain to people in a short sentence why exactly I had so many problems with this movie is not an easy task, because so much of it is under the surface of a good film.

“But it’s Toy Story 4, how can it be bad??”

That’s just it–it’s not bad. It’s almost insulting how good it is, because it’s even harder to defend myself on why I dislike it so much. And that’s frankly rude of you, Pixar.

I guess all I can do is look at people and say “look. It’s no Wall-e. It’s no Ratatouille.” And hope they understand.

(They won’t of course, because for some reason no one likes Ratatouille? The nerve of some of y’all…)

Pixar established itself early on as a company that cares. Genuinely. They took a medium that was established in America as being for kids only, and turned it into something more. The movies they make are for kids, sure, but it’s more than that–they’re for everyone. They rarely pandered to you with characters or a message that was anything less than incredible. I think that’s why Cars 2 was such a disappointment–because that was a kids’ movie more than it was just…a movie. Pixar used to care about continuity, about creating a world and characters we can genuinely care about, because they cared about them, too.

But now that Disney owns them? It’s starting to look hopeless. Gone is the love and care and attention to detail (unless it comes to the specific stitches in Bo Peep’s outfit). Disney as a company now only cares about one thing: your money. And they keep getting a lot of it by playing off of established, well-loved franchises and characters.

The results have been…less than ideal. Not all the time! I stand by the live action Cinderella, Incredibles 2, and even Aladdin (which should really be called Jasmine).

But overall?

They’re putting out less-than-stellar work because they don’t think they have to do anything more than that in order to get people’s money. And we’re letting them get away with it.

It’s kind of disgusting, and all the more reason we should absolutely support smaller studios and any animated movie that is not Disney, basically, like the incredible Into the Spider-verse movie and the Laika animation studio.

BASICALLY–all my personal bitterness aside, go see Toy Story 4 if you want to. You’ll probably like it, and it is good.

But if you left the theater after watching Toy Story 3 feeling satisfied and fulfilled at these wonderful characters’ arcs and the amazing completion of the storyline, I’d probably stay away from it. Toy Story 4 doesn’t answer any lingering questions, doesn’t fill any annoying plot holes, and doesn’t make you feel good after watching it. It leaves so much more open than the third movie does, trust me. You might leave feeling like you watched something good, but you probably won’t leave satisfied.

Or maybe you will. I don’t know you, I don’t know your life. I know I’m in the minority on this. Whatever.

Plus, on the other hand, apparently a whole bunch of moms wanted to boycott the movie because in one like, maybe 4-second shot, a child is shown with two moms. So I take it back, go see this movie and then only talk about how fantastic that particular scene is just to anger people and also show Disney we want more stuff like that, please.

Overall, I give Toy Story 4

3/5 SPORKY’S!!! (Because he is a SPORK, not a FORK, DAMMIT)

Look, the whole thing reads like a fan fiction of Toy Story where someone was bitter about Bo Peep’s “missing” status in the third movie, rather than an official installment.

I probably could have just said that about it rather than my long ranting review up there. Oh well. No regrets.

FAVORITE MOMENT:

When Gabby showed herself to the girl crying at the fair. That was much more genuine and much less forced than Woody and Buzz’s goodbye, which in my mind didn’t even happen anyway, so. The movie actually ended after this scene. Crazy, huh?

“OOF” MOMENT:

To everyone saying that “Bonnie’s just a kid and kids are fickle with toys!! Don’t blame her for forgetting Woody and her promise to Andy to look after him!”

Exactly. Kids are fickle about toys. So you can bet one day that Bonnie’s gonna remember Woody and go looking for him…only to find him gone.

Yeah. This is potential canon now. Thanks, Pixar.

TRAILERS TO WATCH OUT FOR:

Spies in Disguise has the GREATEST premise I have seen in a long time and I am SO EXCITED FOR IT. Will it be a mess? Very likely. But it just looks like a good time and I am here for it.

Trolls World Tour is a movie that is actually happening…for some reason.

Onward is the first new original Pixar film in YEARS which means I’m naturally thrilled for it. Here’s hoping I don’t have to be talking about Onward 2: Electric Boogaloo in a couple years. But I probably will be.

And that’s it!

Again, odds are you will go see Toy Story 4 and you will like it, and that’s fine. Not every movie can be Black Panther. But we should expect movies to at least make an effort, right? We should want movies that are both visually stunning and filled with thought-provoking plots and delightful characters?? Not just movies that are pretty much only visually stunning??? *cough*TOYSTORY4 AND ALITABATTLEANGEL*cough*.

*shrug emoji*

A Collection of Mini Reviews (Miniviews)

OH HEY EVERYONE.

So like I mentioned when I started this blog, I have that AMC A-List thing which means I have the opportunity to go see quite a lot of movies!

Which is super fun until I have absolutely no motivation to review them and then the other parts of my life start kicking up and then I get distracted by other things (namely, and I’m 100% serious: My Singing Monsters Composer. #notsponsored)…yeah.

So I finally sat down to do a tally this morning, and realized that I have seen SIX movies lately that I haven’t reviewed. Like a FOOL. Now because I don’t know how to say anything concisely, those six full-fledged reviews would take a loooooooong time. And I realized that of those six, there aren’t really any that stood out in such a significant way that I’d want to write a full-fledged review about them (with the exception of Booksmart because…Y’ALL. But in that case, just take my word for it and go see it because I cannot fully put into words how delightful it is).

So this post is a catch-up of sorts: I’m gonna do a mini review (or miniview if you will, because…reasons) for each of those six films and just crash-course them to the essentials. So without further ado, let us go!

MINIVIEW 1: BOOKSMART

MY THOUGHTS:

I cannot say enough about this movie. I have seen it three times now and I will be seeing it many more. It’s clever, it’s funny, it’s raunchy (but not too much), it’s an absolute delight from start to finish. The acting is amazing, the directing is great, it’s so beautifully shot, and the music?? THE MUSIC?? Spotify has something called “The Official Booksmart Playlist” which features all the songs used in the film plus little commentary clips from composer and arranger Dan the Automator and director Olivia Wilde, which is ridiculously fun if you’re a mega nerd like me. It’s just so obvious that so much love and care was put into this film, and it feels like a love letter to high school and buddy cop movies alike. Plus, it’s incredibly quotable. I know that I was skeptical because the trailer made it seem like…I mean it could be good, but…it could also be really not good. But it’s so, so good. Please do yourself a favor and see it. It does exactly what movies should do: allow you an escape alongside characters you can love in a story you can enjoy and appreciate.

There are so many little things that I love: the casual all-gender restroom scene, the main relationship focus being a positive and supportive female friendship, Amy doesn’t have a plot line about discovering she’s gay and dealing with that it’s just who she is, Molly doesn’t have a plot line about being plus-size and dealing with that it’s just who she is…I could go on and on forever.

Plus–IT’S AN ORIGINAL STORY!!! It’s not a remake!! It’s not a sequel!! It’s not based on a book!!! IT JUST EXISTS!!!!!!!!!!

STANDOUT ELEMENT:

The movie is shot and written in such a way that you judge all of Molly and Amy’s classmates the same way they do, so that when each classmate’s story is revealed by the end, you’re kind of ashamed of yourself for judging them like Molly and Amy do…because you experience everything with them, you feel everything with them, too. When Molly and Amy come crashing into graduation and all their classmates cheer? Iconic. You want to cheer as well. When Molly talks about each classmate and how she’s learned who they really are? You have, too! It’s such a fun way to experience the story and I just love everyone and I’M FULL OF FEELINGS.

Every character has a story that serves to flesh them out as an individual and make them likable…Unlike, say another movie I could mention…….

*cough*ALITABATTLEANGEL*cough*

Also–that underwater scene at the party????? I CANNOT.

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

YES.

Overall, I give Booksmart

6/5 SCHOOL BOOKS!!!

Seriously, it’s such a good time, and it suffered at the box office opening weekend because it came out alongside Aladdin (we’ll get to that) and John Wick (we will not get to that). We want more movies like this, fam.

MINIVIEW 2: UGLYDOLLS

MY THOUGHTS:

I struggled with what to say about this one because I know it got a lot of negative reviews when it came out. I was excited because I’m generally a sucker for musical movies, I’m very nostalgic for Uglydolls, and Janelle Monáe is in it. Once I saw it, I guess the reason I didn’t relate to all the negative reviews is because like…this is very clearly a kids’ movie. You can’t review it like a movie movie because it never presents itself as such. Unlike, say, the How to Train Your Dragon franchise. HTTYD is a series for kids based off a bunch of kids’ books, sure, but it is presented in such a way with serious themes that it’s a family film, rather than a kids’ film. Uglydolls never tries to invoke serious themes like HTTYD does, or like most Pixar movies do (….most). If you just appreciate it for what it is, it’s a very well-done kids’ movie. It’s not a great adult/family movie because it never tries to be: it’s a kids’ movie, guys. Chill out.

Am I biased because Kelly Clarkson and Janelle Monáe are in it? Most definitely. But this is a solid, fun, feel-good movie.

STANDOUT ELEMENT:

The animation is to die for, but what really stands out to me is the overall message of the film: beauty standards are dumb.

This film serves as such a huge kick in the teeth to the beauty industry and society as a whole that I just have to applaud it? I mean the main antagonist is a white, blonde guy who decides what makes everyone else beautiful even though he looks nothing like most of them. There’s a girl who needs glasses but she’s afraid to wear them because she’s been told they make her less beautiful. All of the Uglydolls are told they’ll never be wanted because they’re not perfect enough. And even then, when they try to conform to the ridiculous beauty standards Nick Jonas’s character sets, he still doesn’t accept them. The good ending only comes when they all realize that they’re beautiful and perfect just the way they are–do you even know how important it is for kids to hear messages like that in the media? They’re growing up in a world where fat-shaming, photoshopping, and racism in the beauty industry run rampant and are hardly ever called out (although they are more so now). The more kids learn to be comfortable with exactly who they are and how they look, the less power the beauty industry has over them. And that’s phenomenal.

And to the reviewer who complained that the message of the movie was completely contradicted because the Uglydolls aren’t actually ugly, they’re adorable? That’s the whole damn point, my dear. The Uglydolls represent everyone who has been told by society that they are not enough for whatever reason, but they are enough. They’re not ugly, of course they’re not. No one is ugly. Society tries to tell us there are people who are ugly and people who are perfect, but the point is that that is not true at all: everyone is beautiful and wonderful just the way they are, no matter what.

Plus, super fun songs. I mean, Kelly Clarkson’s Moxie singing to herself “look how much you weigh! And you couldn’t look better!!” WE STAN A QUEEN.

You know what movie doesn’t have fun songs to get the message across??

…okay a lot of them don’t, but SPECIFICALLY *cough*ALITABATTLEANGEL*cough*

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

Look, it’s super cute and fun. It’s sweet and pure and has really cute and genuinely funny moments (Gibberish Cat gets me every damn time) and I do think that if you have kids, they’ll enjoy it, and you might, too. Please teach the kids in your life that they are beautiful and smart and brave and wonderful just the way they are.

Overall, I give Uglydolls

4/5 UGLYDOLLS!!!

I personally didn’t think it was the mess that reviews made it out to be. Could I be biased? 100% absolutely. So decide for yourself. AND REMEMBER THAT YOU ARE GORGEOUS, WITH OR WITHOUT GLASSES OR WHATEVER.

MINIVIEW 3: DETECTIVE PIKACHU

MY THOUGHTS:

I KNEW EVERYONE WAS CRYING ABOUT THE BULBASAURS BUT THAT STILL DIDN’T FULLY PREPARE ME AND I WAS SOBBING ABOUT BULBASAURS

*ahem* So anyway.

I think Uglydolls and Detective Pikachu are similar in that they both very specifically knew their audience. Where Uglydolls was directly aimed at kids, Detective Pikachu was directly aimed at kids obsessed with Pokémon as well as adults like me who grew up with Pokémon and are fully willing to cry about Bulbasaurs.

So with all that in mind, I thought it was absolutely delightful. It was cute, well-animated and well-acted, and I just…Ryan Reynolds. As Pikachu. I never knew I needed that.

Was the plot twist completely predictable? Of course. Was it cheesy and goofy and unrealistic? 112%. But it was so much fun and just…I loved it?

STANDOUT ELEMENT:

I think what made the movie work, despite the ridiculousness and the predictability and the goofiness is that it truly was a love letter to the franchise. Remember when Pokémon Go came out and we all lost our collective minds because oh my god there’s a Squirtle in my living room??! They captured that magic yet again with this film, but tenfold. So much love and care was put into every Pokémon that appeared, down to how they interacted with the modern world around them in the most minute ways. Their designs were faithful to the original but adapted just enough to make them fit in (unlike, say for example completely randomly……Sonic the Hedgehog…..)

It was literally like watching my childhood come to life on the big screen and it was just…it was amazing.

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

It really depends. If you love Pokémon, absolutely. It’s so fun and precious and wonderful. But if you have no idea what Pokémon is and the entire thing about Bulbasaurs confused you, I think you can skip it. The downside of this film is that I really don’t think it has anything to offer anyone who’s unfamiliar with the franchise. But that being said, it never promised to and it doesn’t have to. It was made for people that are already fans of the franchise, and for once, it’s an adaptation that is both faithful and completely new. It’s filled with love and that is so nice to see, especially when compared to…The Sun is Also a Star. Or probably like, say, *cough*ALITABATTLEANGEL*cough*. Although I don’t know for sure on that one since I came in completely unfamiliar with the source material. I just like bringing it up whenever I can.

Overall, I give Detective Pikachu….

4/5 POKÉMON THAT MADE ME CRY!!!!

Seriously. Look at that Bulbasaur. Look at his little green Bulbasaur face.

MINIVIEW 4: ROCKETMAN

MY THOUGHTS:

Let’s establish that I was probably completely biased coming into this film as well because Taron Egerton, first of all, and the love of my life Jamie Bell. That is all.

This movie is incredibly well done. I loved the framing element of Elton John being in AA as we cut back and forth to his life story, and all the music scenes with the dancing and just…it was all super fun.

I do know (because this is just what people do I guess) that a lot of people have compared this to last year’s Bohemian Rhapsody and the general consensus seems to be that Rocketman is somehow better. I genuinely think the only way you can compare these films is to mention that they’re both a form of biopic documenting some iconic musicians, and also both Freddie Mercury and Elton John were in incredibly abusive relationships with their managers at one point (and they both overcame it!). But Bohemian Rhapsody was explicitly shot like a concert whereas Rocketman is explicitly shot like a movie musical, or even a music video. They have completely different points and reasons for the story being told, and one isn’t necessarily “better” than the other one. You’re welcome to like one more than the other, of course, but they’re both good movies. Bohemian Rhapsody was swarmed in controversy because of the director, but a movie is so much more than its director, and if that’s the reason you’re dismissing it, you need to rethink it. Both these films are incredibly well-done and amazing. Elton John himself had good things to say about Rocketman, and Queen themselves worked right alongside everyone for Bohemian Rhapsody.

They’re both good films, everyone. Enjoy them for what they are and form your own opinions of course–but don’t compare these two films and raise one up for the sake of knocking the other one down.

Compare them to Alita: Battle Angel and knock that one down.

(Kidding, sort of…I know lots of people really liked Alita and that is…so great for them)

STANDOUT ELEMENT:

I have a huge weakness for self-love plotlines, so the whole scene near the end where Elton John got to confront everyone in his life including his own past self had me bawling. It’s a beautifully shot scene and it’s such a satisfying way to lead in to the end of the story.

Also, in general all the over-the-top dancing for the musical scenes. Super fun and ridiculous and I loved every second of it.

Also also, Taron Egerton and Jamie Bell. MY SONS.

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

I think so. Even if you’re not a huge Elton John fan, you’ve likely heard at least a couple of his songs, and it’s just a good story that’s told in a beautiful and fun way.

Plus like….Taron Egerton……y’all.

(Fun Fact: this is actually the second time Taron Egerton has sung “I’m Still Standing” for a movie! I think this should be a career requirement for him from here on in)

Overall, I give Rocketman

4.5/5 ELTON JOHN SUNGLASSES!!!

These by no means match the most fun ones both in existence and in the film, but it’s a fun taste. Go see the movie to see more of them!!

MINIVIEW 5: MEN IN BLACK: INTERNATIONAL

MY THOUGHTS:

So I will freely admit that I haven’t read reviews for this one since I wanted to go in blind, and I only saw it…last week? I think? Anyway. But I guess it’s getting bad reviews because I got a YouTube notification that was something like “why MIB: International completely bombed” and I…wasn’t aware that it had?

I went with a couple friends and we were in a BIG theatre that was completely full, and everyone was laughing and enjoying themselves. This might be another example of “critics hated it because they have no souls but audiences generally liked it” (wait–do I have to count myself as a critic now? NOOOO DON’T LUMP ME IN WITH THEM).

Here’s the thing: it’s not the original movie. It can’t be. The original is iconic and hilarious and wonderful and nothing can ever be that one. What I appreciate is that this film never tries to be the original, and maybe that’s why people didn’t like it? I dunno. It is completely and fully its own story, with its own characters and own aliens and own conflicts. It’s original and unique and goofy.

It’s an incredibly fun time. All the characters are likable and fun, and I totally thought I knew the twist and I thought they were hinting at it and THEN THEY SWITCHED AROUND THE TWIST ON ME AND IT WAS SOMETHING ELSE ENTIRELY SO THAT’S GREAT.

Is it a standout, knockout, over-the-top amazing film? Nah.

But it is well-done and a damn good time.

STANDOUT ELEMENT:

There’s a light hint of it, but I am proud to report that there is absolutely no romance between Tessa Thompson and Chris Hemsworth’s characters. Huzzah! More than anything, they have an incredible friendship and an incredible partnership.

The special effects are absolutely incredible.

Tessa Thompson wears a suit just like all the other agents (although she does have some kickass fun combat boots).

Emma Thompson is in charge of the American branch and she’s killin it.

Tessa Thompson’s character stops a fight by using relationships and a prior friendship, but she can also hold her own in a fight and she’s probably a lot more capable than Chris Hemsworth–

Ooooooooohhhhhhhhhh.

Is this why everyone was mad? Because Tessa Thompson saved Chris Hemsworth multiple times and was probably a better agent than him? Because Emma Thompson is in a position of authority?

Ahhhhhhh it all makes sense now. It was more a Women in Black film than a Men in Black film, and that’s why people are pissed…

I mean no one seemed to be mad about Alita being all kickass and whatever in her movie…is it because her character was presented in a much more sexualized way than the women in MIB: International were? Yeah. Yeah that’s it probably.

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

Yep. Not only is it a fun time, it’s also pissing off older white guys because it has powerful female characters! So go support it!!

(Also–if you were worried like I was that Kumail Nanjiani’s mini alien character would just be annoying the whole time, rest assured that he was genuinely entertaining and extremely lovable and fun)

Overall, I give Men in Black: International

3.75/5 MIB SUNGLASSES!!

I know I did sunglasses for Rocketman but like…it’s MIB…I couldn’t not…..

MINIVIEW 6: ALADDIN

MY THOUGHTS:

Like many of Disney’s upcoming live-action remakes (Lady and the Tramp??? REALLY???) I was convinced this was completely unnecessary and I was not excited for this…like at all.

I knew I should see it probably, but I kept avoiding it because like…eh. I really love the original animated movie, and this just didn’t look like it offered anything new.

Maybe it’s because I went in with such low expectations, but I’m happy to report that I was pleasantly surprised by this movie. It wasn’t like, absolutely amazing by any means, but I actually kinda liked it.

This is mostly due to Naomi Scott’s Jasmine, but we’ll get to her.

The additions to the story and the costumes are both beautiful, and if anyone can perform the genie instead of Robin Williams, it’s Will Smith. It’s a fun, quirky time and a really lovely film. Not incredible, but definitely good, actually. Again, though, I set the bar real low going into it.

Oddly enough, I think one of the low points of the film was actually Aladdin himself? Not that he wasn’t great, Mena Massoud did an excellent job, but the character himself was just kinda…there. Plus–have you seen Massoud’s natural curly hair?? So much better than what we got in the movie. I think they were trying to make him look like the animated version, but they already changed so much else, just let us have his natural curly hair!!! He is so lovely!!! GIVE US THE CURLS!!!!!

STANDOUT ELEMENT:

NAOMI SCOTT’S PRINCESS JASMINE. HANDS-DOWN.

I mean, she was good during the whole of the story, but when she sang “Speechless” and literally disintegrated all the men in her life telling her what to do?? ICONIC AND AMAZING AND SHE IS EVERYTHING.

Unsurprisingly, the guys who wrote “Speechless” also wrote the songs for The Greatest Showman (YAAAAAAAS) and La La Land (…meh). It’s an incredible standout power ballad that takes Jasmine’s character from decent to incredible. She takes center-stage in the best way, and all the little girls that wanna be Jasmine for Halloween this year? It’s gonna mean something completely different–it’s gonna mean being a princess who will not be silenced and will take power to do good.

Genuinely by the end I didn’t want Jasmine to end up with Aladdin because she doesn’t need him?? Like they can be bros I guess but she quite literally don’t need no man. This film should have been called Jasmine. She 100% stole the show and turned it into something else entirely in the best way possible.

Unlike, say, another movie named after the main girl….*cough*ALITABATTLEANGEL*cough*

Also–lots of fun political commentary if you know where to look. Especially if you wanna make parallels between Jafar and…someone else…

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

Actually, yeah. This movie did what a remake should do (if remakes should do anything, that is, since many are unnecessary): it pays homage to what made the original so good while also adding something completely new that both makes this version good, too, while setting it apart as something different.

It’s a good time, and if you were skeptical like I was, you may just find yourself pleasantly surprised.

Also–you have to experience “Speechless.” You don’t watch or listen to “Speechless”–you experience it. No, really.

Overall, I give Aladdin (which should really be called Jasmine)…

3.5/5 HAPPY GENIE LAMPS!!!

Like I’ve said for some past films, it’s good. It’s not great, but it’s good.

TRAILERS WE HAVEN’T DISCUSSED YET:

K, crash course trailers, here we go:

1. Sonic the Hedgehog–release has been delayed because of the public outcry over Sonic’s…unique design. Fingers crossed they treat the animators/designers fairly and let them eat during all of this, but probably not. Jim Carrey as Eggman looks worth the price of admission alone, I love my son.

2. Godzilla: King of the Monsters–I know we have discussed this one, but there’s a new trailer where one of the scientist guys introduces Godzilla by breathily saying “Zillaaaaaaaaa” and it’s just…it’s the strangest and funniest thing ever.

3. Yesterday–I’m going to see this hopefully soon!! I love the premise and I hope it’s really good and fun like it looks. Plus, Lily James ❤

4. Blinded by the Light–uhhhhhhhh a movie by the team that made Bend It Like Beckham???? I AM SO THERE?????

5. Maleficent: Mistress of Evil–I’m curious to see what they do with this one because a sequel is so incredibly unncessary?? This is like if they announced a sequel to Toy Story 3, I mean, all the loose ends were tied up in a perfect way and it’s so good the way it is, what could you possibly–…oh, wait.

6. Crawl–Yeahhhh this is a big nope from me. This is like Anxiety: The Movie, and I’m not about that life. I barely survived watching Pet Sematary alone you guys, how on earth do you expect me to do survival-crocodile-jumpscare movie?? I do really like how the music for the trailer is all made by like, rhythmic water drips and flashlight-winding. That’s kind of fun.

7. Child’s Play–WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS?? Really though, it looks like they updated the idea so that Evil Doll Chucky is connected to a sort of smart-home system, so it’s like…they update the horror story so it’s relevant to right now?? Fascinating. Also, absolutely horrifying. I don’t care how much I love you Mark Hamill, I refuse.

8. Where’d You Go, Bernadette–This is probably better than the trailers make it seem (also, that last trailer gives away?? Everything??). I love me some Cate Blanchett, and this just looks like a really delightful and fun heartwarming story about family or whatever.

9. Angel Has Fallen–I think this is the one where the president is attacked and the guy who saves him is under arrest for some reason and there were a lot of explosions?? I guess this is a sequel, and I honestly have no desire to see either one of these.

10. The Art of Racing in the Rain–YO CATCH ME CRYING IN THE THEATER WHEN THIS MOVIE COMES OUT, THIS BOOK IS SO INCREDIBLY GOOD AND I AM SO READY TO SOB ABOUT A DOG WHO LOVES RACE CARS ALL OVER AGAIN!!!!!!!

11. Judy–I don’t have strong feelings about this one, but I’m sure it’s another well-made biopic about an icon and all that. I’ll probably see it.

12. The Kitchen–this looks like it could be really good and fun (but like, also violent) and I think I’ll try to see it.

13. Terminator: Dark Fate–mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm no.

14. Maiden–This looks absolutely fascinating. I’m all about stories of women who blazed the trail in a male-dominated field for other women. Also like–boats!!

OKAY. That should be everything so we’re all caught up now. I think I’m gonna try to see Toy Story 4 this afternoon, or possibly tomorrow, and then that review WILL BE UP BY THE END OF THE WEEK, I SWEAR. REALLY I DO.

If these films are still playing where you are, check them out! I don’t regret seeing any of them, and they’re all enjoyable in their own way (particularly Booksmart).

Long Shot (2019) REVIEW

So maybe a week ago? Two weeks ago? Whatever time isn’t real.

Anyway, I took myself (and the parents) to the movies and we saw Long Shot.

I did mention Long Shot in the “trailers to watch out for” section of…something. Again, time isn’t real.

I desperately wanted this to be good because there have been so many not great romantic comedies recently and I really, really wanted one.

This one? This one is good. This one is real good.

THE PLOT

So we start off by following Fred Flarsky (Seth Rogan), a no-nonsense journalist who is currently in the middle of going undercover at a white supremacist meeting/rally thing to try and expose them. In the middle of getting a swastika tattoo, his cover is blown and he has to escape–right out a window. Somehow, he survives this incident (this is a theme throughout the movie, Fred is made of some crazy indestructible materials apparently) and is able to escape successfully.

(sidenote–can we talk about how amazing it is that normally in a romantic comedy, the trope is for the girl to be the journalist and the guy to be some successful something or other? The roles are switched here and it’s GREAT)

We then catch up with Charlotte Field (Charlize Theron), the current Secretary of State, as she goes about her normal morning routine of doing the impossible all at once and flawlessly. Seriously, it’s kind of uncomfortable watching her do a phone interview while on an exercise bike. How.

Charlotte is called in to meet with the current president, President Chambers (Bob Odenkirk). Chambers is an…unconventional president to say the least, and in one of my favorite moments, he compliments her on being a great secretary (“…of State.” She adds), and she is able to get him to say he will endorse her for future president while making it seem like it was his idea and a good thing for him to do all at once. Seriously, she’s amazing, and she knows how to play the game.

Charlotte’s employees, Maggie Millikin (June Diane Raphael) and Tom (Ravi Patel) sit with her while they are meeting some other team members to go over Charlotte’s numbers. Of course, most of the numbers are about her likability rather than her policies because this is America and that’s how we judge women. The main number she needs to work on currently is sense of humor, so Maggie suggests some speech writers for Charlotte to interview who will help with that.

Meanwhile, Fred quits his job because the company gets bought out by Parker Wembley (Andy Serkis). Wembley is…not a great guy, to say the very least, and Fred complains that much of the company’s goals at least originally were to expose people like Wembley. But in true capitalistic fashion, money wins, and Fred quits.

Fred’s bestie Lance (O’Shea Jackson Jr.) gets him into a fancy party in an attempt to cheer him up, and that’s where Fred and Charlotte meet again for the first time in years. Charlotte used to babysit for Fred when she was in high school, and they haven’t seen each other since. Charlotte calls him over because she feels like she remembers him, and the two have a very adorable meet-cute which is promptly interrupted by Fred confronting Wembley, which is promptly interrupted by Fred flying face-first down the stairs (I’m telling you, he’s indestructible).

Later, Charlotte looks up some of Fred’s writing and likes it enough that she tells Maggie to bring him in. Maggie is less than thrilled about this, but Fred ends up getting the job as speechwriter.

What follows is a surprisingly heartfelt exploration of modern romance, women in the political field, and what it means to be a public figure vs. maybe what it should mean.

THE REVIEW

This movie is great. Really.

I mean I was hoping I would like it, but I really wasn’t prepared to actually love it?

I’m generally not a Seth Rogen person, but he was delightful in this film. He did a great job at playing this quirky little dork of a character with a lot of heart, and it was genuinely heartbreaking watching him doubt himself and end things in order to not compromise who he was.

Also Charlize Theron?? Gorgeous. Stunning. I love her.

I mean, I was laughing out loud, crying a lil’ bit, and thinking a lot. This movie is incredibly politically self-aware, and I applaud it for not shying away from that at all? It definitely isn’t slap-you-in-the-face obvious about it, and it’s clear that the romance and the relationship is in the spotlight, but it also deals with so much more than that in a really smart way.

It’s a clever character study that also shines a light on our current political climate and also like…society as a whole? Like the more I think about this movie the more I’m genuinely impressed with how much it crammed in there. And not crammed in a bad way either, everything was connected and it never felt like too much.

Now, of course, this is a Seth Rogen movie so there’s a fair amount of raunchy humor. I would argue that it never steals the spotlight and I wouldn’t categorize it as a raunchy comedy flick because, again, it’s so much more than that. It’s incredibly clever and endearing.

Okay, I could be vague forever, but what is it exactly that makes this movie so genuinely good?

Spoiler warning now in effect! Although…I mean it’s a romcom so like…I dunno. I say it just to be safe but there’s nothing really to spoil, I don’t think. Anyway.

THE MUSIC

So good and pure and just fun.

I can’t find the official soundtrack on Spotify, but there’s one cinematic orchestra piece in particular that I remember, and it’s from the scene pictured above where they’re working in Charlotte’s room before the attack happens. It was just really sweet and lovely sounding, and it kind of reminded me of the music from The Holiday (HANS ZIMMERRRRRRRRR I love him).

Other than that, there’s of course the party scene where Boyz II Men performs, which is super fun, and of course…the scene where Charlotte and Fred slow dance in the kitchen during the party because they can’t dance in public and I just…Fred plays “It Must Have Been Love” from the Pretty Woman soundtrack (the fact that their romance is like a gender bent Pretty Woman is something Lance brings up earlier on) and it’s SO. PURE.

It also foreshadows their breakup later on which is super sad, but it’s a romcom so like everything ends up fine, I promise.

THE CHARACTERS

One of my favorite elements of any romcom are the well-developed characters all around, and this movie, thankfully, is no exception.

Fred is like a giant human puppy and I love him. He’s funny, of course, but he’s also devoted and clever and opinionated and doesn’t compromise for anything, tough as it may be. Rogen does a really, really great job at portraying such a wholesome character. I mean given his comedian background and the rest of his filmography, I was expecting Rogen to crush the comedy element, but he also does a brilliant job with the more serious scenes. I mean, when he tells Charlotte that he can’t go through with the character training in order to be her public partner because he won’t compromise who he is?? ICONIC. It’s so clear that he is so much more than just “the funny guy the pretty girl falls in love with,” and I really appreciate that. Is he still an idiot guy with raunchy jokes and moments? Oh for sure. But he’s not only that.

Charlize Theron brings so, so much to the part of Charlotte. In some ways I think Charlotte is really the main character more than Fred, which I love. One of my absolute favorite scenes is when Charlotte announces she’ll be running for president–and so much of that is Theron’s acting. You can see the physical change in her when she goes from straitlaced, perfect public figure to actual human being and sad girl in love, and it’s actually amazing. Charlotte is, thankfully, a fully-developed, incredible female character. She has reasons for everything she does, and if she doesn’t, we see her figure out her reasons. She’s strong and brilliant just as much as she is emotional and powerless. Seeing her battle the political climate is heart wrenching, and then seeing her overpower it and win? I. LOVE. IT.

Yet again, we have a beautiful example of a fully-fledged female character who is relatable and lovable because we see all sides of her, and not despite it *cough*ALITABATTLEANGEL*cough*.

I’m not sure I’ll ever get over that.

Anyway, Lance is another really wonderful character. He’s the best friend who knocks sense into Fred whenever necessary, but he also has a fair amount of development? One of my favorite, favorite scenes is when he reveals that he’s a Republican and a Christian. The scene is played out in such a way that it defines his character, but it also…doesn’t? His character is presented in such a way that you as the audience member probably had your own prejudices and assumptions about him that get absolutely smashed in that one scene. You get called out just as much as Fred does. But Lance is so wholesome about it? He’s still the same character you knew from the beginning of the film. Now you just know a little more about him. I appreciate it. I love him. I want him to be my friend.

Maggie and Tom (but Maggie especially) are also great characters. This movie is almost like a version of Pride and Prejudice with how much it tackles those subjects. Maggie is so scared of and obsessed with public opinion that she does all she can to politely separate Fred and Charlotte, but when she sees everyone’s positive reaction to them as a couple? You take a deep breath with her. You are happy and relieved just like she is. Your prejudice about humanity being judgmental is changed just like hers is. As much as you may want Fred and Charlotte together, you also fear for the public reaction just as much as Maggie does. As frustrating as Maggie can be, she’s never unlikable because it’s easy to see yourself in her, and her mini arc is just as satisfying as the romantic one.

Parker Wembley is a terrible human being, but he’s supposed to be, so he’s a great character. Also–he doesn’t win. SO SATISFYING.

President Chambers is such a cheeky take on the presidency that you can’t help but love him. I mean you want to shake him sometimes, but he’s also such a cleverly written character that you have to appreciate him to some degree. Also–he doesn’t win. ALSO SO SATISFYING.

Pretty much every character you meet is developed and has a story and reasons for behaving the way they do, and it’s such a refreshing sight.

THE ROMANCE

So you know how with some romcoms, everything else is really good but the actual romance itself is just kinda…eh? Like the plot is good, the characters themselves are great, the idea is awesome, and then the couple is just…ehhhhhh?

But then there are some romcoms where the romance steals the show. Your heart is full, your skin is clear, and your crops are watered…everything is perfect.

This romance? Iconic.

What makes the movie work so well is that just as it advertises, Charlize Theron and Seth Rogen should not work. I mean…look at them.

But again, these are so much more human and real than they are just characters. Fred is more than just a bumbling goofball, and Charlotte is more than just a beautiful woman. Fred has his serious, beautiful moments just as much as Charlotte has her over-the-top ridiculous moments. There’s something about the way it’s written that just…works. I can’t really describe it, and I truly think you have to see it to believe it. It’s an experience.

What I love, too, is that the more lighthearted romantic moments are just as meaningful as the more serious ones. I mean, the two of them watching movies together is just as cute as the two of them slow-dancing in a kitchen. The two of them getting high and dancing at clubs is just as heartwarming as the two of them spending quiet moments together on planes.

And don’t even get me started on the super serious sad scenes. We never see Charlotte scared because she can’t be a scared woman in politics, but when she suggests that Fred change his character in order to be with her in public? When she comes to his apartment and cries about how much she loves him and wants to be with him? IT’S SO SWEET AND HEARTFELT I WILL CRY FOREVER.

The romance is so endearing because it’s so, so hopeful. Movies aren’t really hopeful anymore. Romance is now used for cynical plots in stories, or never brought up at all. Couples don’t get to be happy anymore. It’s exhausting.

But this story? Fred and Charlotte are best friends as much as they are lovers, and we all know that couple in our lives. Sure, modern romance is like, impossible. But we know it exists. I love that this movie gave it to us, and showed us that it can win.

Also I’m a diehard romantic so this was RIGHT UP MY ALLEY, OKAY. LEAVE ME ALONE.

THE COMEDY

As much as I laughed at Adam Sandler’s SNL jab at the movie for being about a dorky guy and beautiful woman since Sandler’s done that plot so many times before, I liked this movie better. Like, don’t get me wrong, 50 First Dates is one of my favorites forever and Just Go With It has one of my favorite romantic scenes ever–but this movie has all of that without falling back on typical adult, raunchy humor. Again, there are moments of that! But it’s always for a purpose and never just to get a reaction out of the audience. Sandler’s comedies are filled with that stuff because that’s his brand, but this movie?

Fred pulling out all his drugs during the security check comes back later because that’s how we know he’s able to get drugs for the crazy party night with Charlotte. Their first sex scene where they “don’t last long” is funny and uncomfortable all at once because it seems real. It’s not played up for laughs, but played up for endearment. Fred’s unfortunate video that gets shared to the public is hard to watch and yeah, it’s like the ultimate raunch moment, but it’s a key plot point for a reason: Charlotte calls out the public for judging because “you all do it.” It’s humanizing them rather than characterizing them.

The comedy in the film is never used in a degrading way. It’s always genuinely funny because it’s real, it’s clever, and it’s got heart. Empty comedy never sticks with you or means as much as comedy filled with heart does. It’s good for a quick laugh, sure, but it doesn’t mean anything.

It was so fun to laugh out loud during this film, and there were so many moments that did that. I mean, the evolution of Fred’s tattoo, the one that was going to be a swastika? AMAZING. The entire scene where Charlotte saves a hostage over the phone while she’s high? COMEDY.

The comedy never takes away from the plot and romance, it only adds to it, and it works so, so well.

THE WHOLE

This movie is enjoyable on so many levels, and I’ll try to explain it best as I can, but I really think it’s better to see it to fully grasp it.

1. Everything Charlotte has to put up with as a woman in politics is really well-handled. She has a public face she puts on that is such a fake smile, it actually hurts to watch. All of her team is concerned with her public appearance because that’s how she’ll be graded. She’s willing to compromise her climate change proposal so it’s less useful but looks good and has more people onboard. She has to be funny and strong-willed and beautiful but not too much so. When the president tells her to change her proposal to suit investors or he won’t endorse her and she breaks down, it’s sad to watch. When she is blackmailed into changing her relationship with Fred and ultimately losing it, it’s so, so sad to watch. However, when she takes a breath and tells the public that she loves Fred, deal with it? It was like taking a deep breath and like, physically relaxing to see. She has to do so much more as a woman and the movie doesn’t shy away from the reality of that at all. The best part? She wins. SO SATISFYING. INCREDIBLY SATISFYING.

2. The political commentary as a whole is on the nose but also not at the same time? It never calls anyone out…directly, per se, but if you’re looking for it? The commentary is everywhere, and it’s delightful. President who used to be on a tv show? Yep. Sleazy capitalist guy who looks like…a certain someone everyone knows? Yep. Climate change proposal getting shot down and changed because of big companies? Yep. It doesn’t take away from the film at all, and if you’re not focused on it, it just adds to the realism. But if you’re looking for it? It’s satisfying. So, so satisfying.

3. The scene between Lance and Fred near the end where they talk about Lance being Republican and Fred being racist is incredible. There is so much you can unpack in that one scene that, again, you really have to experience it to fully understand it. It’s just…it’s so well-written, I can’t say enough about it.

4. THE ENTIRE ENDING SEQUENCE WHERE CHARLOTTE BECOMES PRESIDENT AND FRED BECOMES FIRST MISTER AND HE’S SO EXCITED ABOUT IT?? I was crying. I mean part of it was because we finally got to see a woman get sworn in as president (even though it’s fake) and that just really broke something in me, but it’s also like the ultimate victorious hopeful ending. It’s just so uplifting. I’m filled with joy just thinking about it. MY HEART IS FULL AND I AM CRYING AGAIN.

5. I love how much it makes you question political/public figures and the public’s relationship to them. Fred and Charlotte are clearly in love, but they have so much trouble being a couple because everyone’s so afraid of the public reaction and it’s just like…who are we to decide who someone can love? We have no right to this to begin with? Why are real people suddenly our own personal soap opera?? Why is humanity like this.

FAVORITE MOMENT

I loved so much of it, but I am especially obsessed with the scene where Charlotte saves the hostage while high and then announces her victory with a big victory scream and pose, and then of course the scene between Fred and Lance near the end.

“OOF” MOMENT

Look, Fred’s masturbation video is uncomfortable to watch. It just is. But it’s played up in such a genius way for the plot that I actually appreciate it. It’s still uncomfortable, but it’s used so well.

What is an “oof” is the scene where Wembley blackmails Charlotte. It’s sucky. It’s awful.

But he doesn’t win HAHAHA!!

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

YES. PLEASE.

I do think I can see how this movie wouldn’t be for everyone, but please believe me when I say it is so incredibly heartfelt and witty and clever. It’s just such a feel-good time that also makes you think about society and the political climate but like not in an over-the-top way? It always stays so classy??

I genuinely can’t recommend this movie enough. It’s so good.

I give Long Shot

5/5 COMEDIC POLITICAL SPEECHES!!

That last one is just all emojis, you have to read them out loud.

TRAILERS TO WATCH OUT FOR

Late Night looks really, really good and I hope it’s just as good as it looks. Plus I just love Emma Thompson a lot. I’m not a huge Mindy Kaling person but maybe this movie will change that!

Stuber looks like it could be good, but it could also not. Trailers sometimes make it impossible to tell. But this at least looks like it could be a lot of fun.

Shaft doesn’t really look appealing to me, but maybe it’s better than I think it looks. Who knows!

Anna…looks like a movie. Sometimes action movie trailers are all like “action!!! Explosions!!! Gunfire!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!” But like…what is the movie about? Is it just gunfire for two hours? Is there a story?…please?

That about does it for this review!!

If you need a feel-good movie, if you need a good romantic comedy with a lot of modern commentary, if you need to feel hopeful, if you love Charlize Theron in really pretty outfits (saying that, I realize how much that is not the point of the movie since the whole thing is about how much we judge women based on looks…) but also playing a really badass character (fixed it), please take yourself to the movies to see Long Shot!

Like, this almost had to be a shorter review because I can’t fully do it justice. There’s so much about it to appreciate by seeing it in person. It’s a good escapism to a version of the US with a lot of hope. So…I mean you may not like it if you’re really conservative…but then again, maybe hearing Seth Rogen’s in it already made your decision for you, I don’t know you, I don’t know your life.

Missing Link REVIEW

So yesterday, I took myself to the movies and saw Missing Link, the new film from Laika.

If you’re unaware, Laika is a studio that specializes in stop-motion epics that are full of heart and laughs and they generally always make me cry (in a good way), so there’s that. You’ve probably heard of them, they’re the minds behind Coraline, The Boxtrolls, ParaNorman, and Kubo and the Two Strings.

(ParaNorman, by the by, is one of my all-time favorite movies and you can definitely expect a post about it around Halloween because y’all.)

While I feel like I saw advertising for Kubo EVERYWHERE prior to its release, I honestly had no idea Missing Link was even a thing until about a month ago, maybe. I truly didn’t know what to expect, except that it would have amazing visuals and hopefully other good things as well.

I was not entirely disappointed!

THE PLOT

The movie starts by following renowned classy adventurer Sir Lionel Frost (Hugh Jackman) and his less-than-enthusiastic valet Mr. Lint (David Walliams) on an epic quest: to get photographic evidence of none other than the Loch Ness Monster. It seems far-fetched at first, but after a unique move by Frost to broadcast bagpipes underwater, the monster appears! It takes some doing to get the creature posed (poor Mr. Lint is tasked with holding on to the rope), and once the picture is taken, Nessie grabs Mr. Lint in her mouth and dives underwater with him.

“Huh. A carnivore.” Frost says before diving in to rescue his poor valet. Frost does save him, but Nessie whacks their boat in retaliation, destroying the camera and Frost’s proof all in one fell swoop. Mr. Lint quits shortly after, proclaiming “I’m a human being, I can’t take this anymore, you’re INSANE, no wonder everyone leaves you!” Ouch. So, Frost is alone again, and it’s here that he stumbles across a letter written to him about undeniable proof of Bigfoot himself. Filled with new energy, Frost crashes the party of the “League of Adventurers” or whatever to announce his plans to get proof of Bigfoot so they’ll finally accept him into the society. Lord Piggot-Dunceby (Stephen Fry), the head of the society and all around Not Nice Person, strikes a wager with Frost: if he brings back proof, he’ll be let into the society and respected. If he doesn’t, he never bothers them again.

Dunceby is convinced that Frost will fail, but not enough to not take some precautions of his own–he hires someone to kill Frost so any evidence he may or may not find will still never come to light and he’ll never have to deal with Frost again.

Frost, meanwhile, is determined and heads to the address specified in the letter. What he finds, however, is Bigfoot, the missing link himself (Zach Galifianakis). He’s mostly self-educated since he scares everyone off, and wrote to Frost because he hopes Frost will take him to the Himalayas to be with the Yetis, his cousins. He’s the only one of his kind, and he’s lonely, so he figures if he can be with his cousins, he won’t be so lonely anymore.

In exchange, Bigfoot promises to give Frost whatever proof he needs for the society. The deal is struck, and the bizarre duo head off on their adventure. Along the way, they must deal with Dunceby’s hitman, Willard Stenk (Timothy Olyphant), Frost’s old flame Adelina Fortnight (Zoe Saldana), and the hard truth that maybe seeking out family in the wrong people is something many of us are all too good at.

THE REVIEW

I admittedly went into this with very high expectations because, again, I love Laika.

What I got was a very good, very beautiful movie. It’s not my favorite Laika film (nothing beats ParaNorman, nothinggggggg) by any means, but it’s a darn good movie and a really fun one to watch.

I feel like this film, more than some others from Laika, had a lot more “kid humor” in it. Potty humor especially abounds, which is, well, a choice. It’s not necessary for the film (especially when they have really clever jokes about chickens…more on that later) as there are plenty of other ways to establish Mr. Link’s naivety, but I digress.

I feel like that element is really what takes me out of the story more than anything else. There’s also the point that this is a very short film, running about 85 minutes in total, and there’s a lot they have to cram in plot-wise. I refuse to complain about the runtime, however, because it’s stop-motion and the dedication to even get 85 minutes is astonishing to me. So like. Yeah.

Plus like…I’m not the target audience for this film. I may love Laika with all my heart, but this is still a kids’ movie, and kids think that stuff is hilarious. So fine.

All that aside, this is a great movie. It’s so charming and lovable and filled with really interesting political parallels. Just…we’ll get there.

So what is it that makes this movie such a delight? Let’s follow in the big footsteps of Laika’s new family adventure and figure that out.

…that was a stretch for a metaphor, I admit. MOVING ON.

Spoiler warning now in effect!!

THE MUSIC

The music, like the movie as a whole, is charming.

There are a couple musical moments that definitely stood out: “Westward Ho” is a fun track that plays during the montage of Frost traveling to America to find the sender of the letter. “Forest Primeval” is probably my favorite track, and plays when Frost first sees Mr. Link and chases him through the forest. It’s fun and mystical and since it plays before we know his personality, it helps paint the mystery around Mr. Link as Frost desperately tries to catch him. “Bar Brawl” is fun and ridiculous, just like the scene it accompanies. It starts out slow and otherwise unassuming, and then once the fighting kicks up and guys are punching each other for no reason, the instruments really get going and it’s just ridiculous.

Overall, while the music is good, it doesn’t really take center stage at any point during the film, and it doesn’t really need to. It’s good, but it doesn’t take over.

Also, the end credits song “Do-Dilly-Do (A Friend Like You)” is ADORABLE. Please listen to it if you need to feel happy, it should do the trick. And it’s been stuck in my head all day and I can’t even complain about it.

Also, fun fact, the composer is Carter Burwell, who also did the music for the Twilight series, Three Billboards, and A Knight’s Tale. So. The more you know.

THE CHARACTERS

Since characters in media mean a lot to me and I won’t get invested if I don’t care about them *cough*ALITABATTLEANGEL*cough*, a big reason Laika is so dear to my heart is that they create such good characters. But why?

Despite their incredibly stylized appearances, Laika characters feel like real people. None of the characters in any of their movies are perfect–they’re all flawed in different ways, and their journey in the film usually ties into confronting those flaws and how they affect the other people in their lives. Coraline was so convinced her mother didn’t love her that she ended up traveling to an alternate world where her Other Mother loved her a little too much. Norman was so afraid of and sick of being bullied for his unique power with ghosts that he ignored his destiny so long he almost destroyed the world. Kubo was a scared little kid who just wanted a normal family that he didn’t stop to see the found family he’d created (yeah and then the twist is that they were actually his parents all along, which…ehhhhhh anyway). I would discuss The Boxtrolls, but I haven’t actually seen it since it was in theaters and I don’t remember enough of it to comment. This “dealing with our flaws” thing is something we all have to do at some point, so it’s refreshing to see it have to happen to these cartoon characters in their fantastical worlds, too.

This whole “confronting flaws that affect other people in my life” trope is probably the most prevalent in Missing Link. Lionel Frost is, despite being the guy we follow the entire film while the other characters only come in later, obnoxious. He just is. He’s full of himself, convinced he can do no wrong, and he’s incredibly selfish. He plays it off by being suave and “adventure-savvy,” but he doesn’t realize how much his selfishness affects others. He is only able to find a real happy ending when he starts actually thinking of and caring for others, even if it costs him his precious reputation. Even then, it’s hinted that he’s still not totally learned his lesson, but he’s getting there: Mr. Link is wondering what he’s going to do now that his plan for a home has fallen through, and Frost says “well I’m in the market for a new valet!” And Adelina has to elbow him to remind him to say “a new partner.”

Despite this being probably the most like a typical kids’ film Laika has ever made, it’s the first film to follow an adult protagonist compared to a kid. While Frost’s problems are not kid problems, his journey is still a valuable lesson to kids about making sure you put effort into relationships with people who want you for exactly who you are, not for who you’re not.

Frost’s journey is, of course, mirrored with Mr. Link’s/Susan’s.

(One of my favorite scenes in the film is when Frost is asking Mr. Link to choose his own name, maybe based off of someone who really touched his heart and his life in a positive way. Link goes off about this one prospector who came and didn’t run off scared the second they saw him, and how kind they were. Frost enthusiastically declares that yes! That prospector’s name should be his name! What was the name? And Link smiles and says “Susan.” Frost is initially like “but wait that’s a girl’s name…you know what? It suits you. Susan it is.” Which like??? LOOK AT LAIKA SMASHING GENDERING AROUND NAMES. YOU GO, LAIKA. And for the rest of the review, Mr. Link is now Susan, because that’s his name.)

Susan is just as alone as Frost is, but unlike Frost, Susan realizes this. He doesn’t want to be alone anymore, and called in Frost specifically so that he could find others like him, his kind, his family. Susan is awkward, being self-taught with language, so he doesn’t understand sarcasm or specific sayings. For example, when they’re trying to break into Adelina’s house, Frost hands Susan a grappling hook attached to a rope so that they can climb over the wall. Frost tells him to “throw it over,” and Susan does just that: he throws the hook and the rope in its entirety over the wall. Frost, annoyed, holds out his bag with the rest of his tools and says “oh great, well why don’t you just throw this over the wall, too?” And Susan does, of course. Because he was told to.

While Frost has been educated in “polite society” and understands all of this, Susan does not, and much of the character’s charm and humor comes from this. Susan is like a child in many ways, just wanting to belong and not understanding why people do the things they do.

Frost initially separates himself as much as possible from Susan, not wanting to be associated with him beyond bringing back proof to Dunceby, but Adelina is the one who points out how similar and utterly alone the two characters are. This realization being spelled out for both Frost and the audience is why the ending of the film, where the two characters choose to stay together and be their own family, is so heartwarming and satisfying.

Adelina as a character is just…she’s a spitfire. She’s likable instantly because she doesn’t swoon over Frost like he expects, she’s not afraid to be angry and fight, but she’s also not afraid to be gentle and emotional when it’s called for. She’s a fully rounded-out female character, which is still a rarity in today’s media, as I’ve discussed in both my Alita: Battle Angel review and my Captain Marvel review.

While it’s established that Adelina and Frost have a romantic history, it doesn’t become the sole reason Adelina joins their adventure. She’s been cooped up at home since her husband’s death, and she wants to get out. She flirts with Frost as he gradually becomes a better person, but ultimately, she doesn’t choose to stay with him. She says he’s a great man, now, but she deserves greater. It’s so refreshing to see these two characters acknowledge a past flame between them that clearly caused them both some pain, heal through that, and then ultimately move on. Frost may have wanted her to stay, but he doesn’t ask her to. He lets her go because, again, he’s learning to not be so selfish anymore.

The villains are also one of my favorite parts of any Laika film. Like the heroes, they’re not perfect characters, and they always have some reason behind why they do what they do. Our main villain is Lord Piggot-Dunceby, the mastermind behind the plan to thwart Frost’s expedition and the leader of the Society for Great Men or whatever. Both he and his assistant guy very clearly state that they don’t like Frost, he’s weird, and they aren’t afraid to stoop to new lows to get rid of him. Dunceby complains that all these young people are trying to change the world that he knows, and he doesn’t like it. Electricity. Suffrage. All ridiculous things that he didn’t grow up with, so he doesn’t understand them and doesn’t like them, doesn’t want to learn to understand or like them, so he doesn’t think they’re necessary. In a way, he’s just as selfish as Frost, and in him, we see what happens to someone who never learns to outgrow that selfishness.

The other constant villain is the hitman, Stenk. Stenk is a mean little weasel of a man who resorts to whatever means necessary to get what he wants. Be this in the form of sneaking around to listen in on Frost’s plans, threatening Adelina to get Frost to give up, inciting a mob mentality on the ship so they attack Susan (who, it’s established early on, doesn’t actually like fighting and wishes people weren’t so scared of him), the list goes on and on. Like Dunceby, Stenk believes that things should be done the way they always have been done, and like Frost, he wants fame attached to his name. Stenk initially wants to kill off Frost so he can take credit for the Bigfoot discovery, and it’s that notion that makes Frost start the bar fight with him. If Dunceby is the ultimate example of Frost’s selfishness, Stenk is the ultimate example of Frost’s journey for power and fame. Stenk, like Frost, has no real family or friends and is ultimately alone. He’s convinced that having his name be known and being famous will fix all his problems, but his death at the end of the film ultimately affects…no one. He dies alone, and as we’ll discuss a little later, he chooses to. Stenk and Dunceby are important foils for Frost, because by the end of the movie, Frost sees how easy it is to become them, and he realizes that he doesn’t want to.

Also Emma Thompson makes an appearance as a Yeti elder once they reach the Himalayas and she’s great. We’ll get to the Yetis in a moment.

THE ART

Like all Laika films, Missing Link is beautiful to watch. Someone on tumblr mentioned that it’s probably Laika’s prettiest film to date, and I would definitely agree. While every Laika film does a great job at visual world-building, they’ve absolutely upped the ante with every film, and Missing Link is definitely a crowning achievement. They built different sets to show the bustling streets of London, the forests and towns of early North America, the ocean during a storm, the beautiful, lush scenery of India, and the towering mountains of the Himalayas. Every shot of scenery is done with the utmost care and you can absolutely tell. There’s even a shot during the end credits where they show the workers building the India set as the elephant puppet is controlled and walking around–you’re able to get just a sense of how much work goes into these movies, even in just a short, seconds-long clip, and it’s just astounding.

For the actual character puppets, Laika uses 3D printers to create every single facial expression the characters use, and they swap out each face on the puppet for each frame as needed. I was able to see some of the different printed faces used in Coraline at the Cartoon Art Museum in San Francisco, and wow. I highly recommend looking up behind the scenes stuff for Laika films, because it just makes watching the movies a whole new experience and you appreciate everything so much more.

The colors used in the film are bright and cheerful, especially when Frost first sets out on his Bigfoot expedition. The character designs are stylized and fun, especially Susan himself, who is just the embodiment of the word “lovable.”

I can’t truly do the visuals of the film justice through words, you really have to see it to experience it all and fully grasp what I mean. It’s a very pretty movie. It really is, but calling it that just doesn’t do it justice.

THE TWIST/THE END

While Missing Link does have a twist of sorts, it’s not really on the same narrative-changing scale as say, ParaNorman.

Our bedraggled travelers have finally reached their destination, populated by Yetis, Susan’s own kind! They’re greeted by a Yeti Elder, who asks why they have come. Frost and the Elder actually have an interesting back-and-forth, where Frost promises they are not there to destroy anything the Yetis have built. Susan says he just wants to be with his family.

The Elder looks at Susan and says “ah…yes…our…cousin. The redneck.” She takes the three outside to a hidden valley in the snow-covered mountains, which she says has remained untouched and pure and always should. Our protagonists swear they’re not here to change that, but the Elder doesn’t believe them. (A great funny moment is when Frost says “we found it! Shangri-La!” And the Elder says “it has many names. We call it *unintelligible roaring noise*. It means “Keep Out, We Hate You.”)

She has them thrown into “The Inescapable Pit of Misery and Disappointment,” and boy, you can just tell how disappointed Susan is at being thrown away to rot by those who should love and accept him because they’re family.

We expect the Yetis to be different, to be welcoming to Susan, whom we’ve come to love and adore over the course of the film…but the Yetis are exact mirrors of the Society of Cool Guys back in London that Frost is obsessed with. Adelina points out that both Frost and Susan have been so busy desperately trying to prove themselves to people who don’t even want them, they don’t notice how alike they both are. She calls “the Great Lionel Frost” a myth, just like the monsters he chases, because he isn’t a great man. He isn’t even a good one.

Something about this strikes a chord in Frost, and he tells Susan to get up, because he’s going to fulfill his end of the bargain: he’s going to take Susan to where he belongs.

*cue EVERYONE CRYING but mostly me, probably*

The group manages to escape the Pit and evade the Yetis (while the Elder yells “quick! The people we don’t want here are escaping!!”) only to be stopped on the ice bridge by none other than Dunceby and Stenk (and the assistant guy whose name I completely forgot). Dunceby, determined to make sure Frost’s discovery never sees the light of day so he can’t outshine him, breaks the ice bridge, yelling out what would have once been Frost’s greatest nightmare and probably still is Dunceby’s: “no one will remember your name!”

It’s not Frost’s greatest fear anymore, though. His greatest fear now is losing the ones he’s come to care so much about, so they run. Dunceby, so caught up in his fury and obsession, doesn’t realize what he’s done until it’s too late, and he falls as the bridge breaks.

The whole thing is falling apart, now, as the characters desperately try to outrun it. The assistant guy is unable to and also ends up falling to his death. Then it’s just Frost, Adelina, and Susan, all tied together with a rope and hanging on for dear life. Stenk is safe, and is all set to drop the heroes to their doom. Frost says that he doesn’t have to, Dunceby is gone, now! But Stenk says that it isn’t about the paycheck anymore, he just genuinely hates Frost at this point and wants him gone, especially by his hand.

In the ensuing confrontation, our heroes manage to work together to safely reach the top of the cliff, while Stenk, so determined to off Frost, also falls into the rocks below.

Normally, in Laika films, the villains are developed in such a way that we want to see them be redeemed–they’re fully-formed characters just as much as the protagonists are, so there has to be a chance, right?

The difference here is that even if there is a chance for these three characters, they don’t want to change. They’re so caught up in their hatred and fear of Frost changing things and overshadowing them that their deaths serve as a sort of metaphor: they let their negativity rule their lives so much that it overpowered them and caused their ultimate demise. While Frost serves as a reminder that it’s so, so easy to become like those characters, it’s also just as easy to not become like them.

There’s a fascinating scene earlier in the film where Dunceby learns that Frost has evaded Stenk yet again and still lives. Dunceby throws a literal temper tantrum, in public, in front of all these people, and then proclaims that Frost’s existence is the “destruction of civilized society!!”

…Really?

It’s fitting, then, that he causes his own death by destroying something beautiful–an ice bridge that leads to Shangri-La itself.

While the assistant guy seems a little unsure of some of Dunceby’s actions, he ultimately stands by him and supports Dunceby’s decision to send a literal hitman after the guy. He dies trying to escape the results of Dunceby’s actions, and he’s unable to. While the assistant guy didn’t call any of the shots on his own, he certainly didn’t make any effort to stop Dunceby, and it caught up with him later.

Stenk is offered a chance by Frost. Frost says that Dunceby is gone, this doesn’t matter anymore! But Stenk is so obsessed with the principal of the thing, he puts his revenge ahead of anything else, his belief that Frost is still the bad guy…and it costs him dearly.

Now I don’t know how intentional any kind of political metaphor is in this movie, but I’m just saying…it’s interesting that all the villains work for a “Society of Great and Awesome Men” who believe that “men shape the world!” (“But I’ve learned that the world shapes us!” Frost says in response to this at the end) and that any kind of opposition to this way of life is a threat to everything they hold dear. They’re all old white guys. I’m just saying.

Dunceby even yells at Frost “you’ve aligned yourself with apes and women!” As if that’s an insult. Both the audience and Frost, by this point, have learned that both Susan and Adelina are so much more than that. But Dunceby refuses to see that because it goes against what he believes and it threatens his power.

There’s so much more we can talk about–how easily Stenk tries to stir up a mob on the ship by pointing at Susan carrying Adelina (he just rescued her) and yelling “look! A monster! And he’s got a defenseless girl!” Susan responds to this by saying “monster?” While Adelina says “DEFENSELESS??”

Or how Dunceby is introduced as a character by telling some long, drawn-out tale about his conquests and by waving a gun around.

Or how Dunceby tells Frost that the Society is renowned for traveling the world and “conquering and rescuing the savages” they come across.

Or how easily all the guys in the bar started fighting once just one person starts fighting, but Susan makes a face and doesn’t want to–who’s supposed to be the civilized one, again?

Or how Frost & Co. made a point of respecting Gamu the elder and asking for her help to find Shangri-La, whereas Dunceby & Co. made a point of threatening her, and when that didn’t work, threatening her baby grandson so they could get information out of her.

I’M JUST. SAYING.

FAVORITE MOMENT

I absolutely adored that entire opening sequence with the Loch Ness monster, it was just so fun and quirky. But I also totally loved the entire “dinner with Gamu” scene and all the jokes about the chicken (the chicken that we don’t talk about, of course). While my favorite moments are probably the funny ones because I think they’re executed so well, I also just enjoyed (of course) the visuals for the movie as a whole.

“OOF” MOMENT

Pretty much anything that was like, potty humor. It’s just not my cup of tea, and while I don’t think it ruined the movie by any means, it did distract at times. A lot of it was framed around Susan’s ignorance and general “not knowing how things work” and all that, which like, at least it makes sense, and one or two jokes would have been fine and still fit the character and narrative, but I just felt like there was too much of it. Again, though, I’m not the target audience, and I get it. I think it’s unfortunate, but I get it.

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

Yes.

Look, my bias for Laika aside, this is a very good movie. It’s charming, it’s witty, it’s uplifting, and if you enjoy possibly unintentional but definitely can be pointed out political commentary that ends in a satisfying way, this movie is for you.

I think it’s so important to support studios like Laika. They put out consistently good films, and they work damn hard on them. There is unbelievable love and care put into every inch of their movies, and it’s not just a movie when they’re done with it: it’s a piece of art.

It’s not my favorite Laika film, it’s not the best movie I’ve ever scene, but it’s damn good and just a lot of fun. And again, we want to support studios like Laika and all the work they do.

Actually pretty much any studio putting out good animated films and isn’t Disney.

Nothing against Disney, just…well, okay, kind of something against Disney. They run the world and maybe like they shouldn’t.

Animated movies don’t get nearly the love and attention that they should because they’re animated, and it’s viewed as just a kids’ medium that can’t carry the emotional weight other films do. Studios like Laika prove that that simply isn’t the case. Animation can be just as breathtaking as live-action, just as powerful, and just as emotional.

Studios like Laika and Cartoon Saloon (The Secret of Kells, The Song of the Sea, The Breadwinner) are proving that animation is a great medium for great stories, and I think we should all support them in that.

Overall, I give Missing Link

4/5 SASQUATCHES!!!

Look, they’re happy to see you!

TRAILERS TO WATCH OUT FOR:

Pretty much everything was a repeat and also showed before Dumbo, with one exception…

They’re making an animated movie of The Addams Family and it looks like it might actually be really, really good.

Other than that, same old, same old.

So that about does it for this review!

If you love Laika like I do, if you want to take your kids to a movie that won’t make you want to die a little inside, if you love a good story with good characters, if you just need an evening to relax and escape to another world where everything turns out happy, if you love found family stories, I highly recommend you take yourself to the movies and see Missing Link.

…we won’t get into how a bunch of stop-motion puppets have more facial expressions than a certain character in Dumbo…I swear……

………….but they totally do.