Missing Link REVIEW

So yesterday, I took myself to the movies and saw Missing Link, the new film from Laika.

If you’re unaware, Laika is a studio that specializes in stop-motion epics that are full of heart and laughs and they generally always make me cry (in a good way), so there’s that. You’ve probably heard of them, they’re the minds behind Coraline, The Boxtrolls, ParaNorman, and Kubo and the Two Strings.

(ParaNorman, by the by, is one of my all-time favorite movies and you can definitely expect a post about it around Halloween because y’all.)

While I feel like I saw advertising for Kubo EVERYWHERE prior to its release, I honestly had no idea Missing Link was even a thing until about a month ago, maybe. I truly didn’t know what to expect, except that it would have amazing visuals and hopefully other good things as well.

I was not entirely disappointed!

THE PLOT

The movie starts by following renowned classy adventurer Sir Lionel Frost (Hugh Jackman) and his less-than-enthusiastic valet Mr. Lint (David Walliams) on an epic quest: to get photographic evidence of none other than the Loch Ness Monster. It seems far-fetched at first, but after a unique move by Frost to broadcast bagpipes underwater, the monster appears! It takes some doing to get the creature posed (poor Mr. Lint is tasked with holding on to the rope), and once the picture is taken, Nessie grabs Mr. Lint in her mouth and dives underwater with him.

“Huh. A carnivore.” Frost says before diving in to rescue his poor valet. Frost does save him, but Nessie whacks their boat in retaliation, destroying the camera and Frost’s proof all in one fell swoop. Mr. Lint quits shortly after, proclaiming “I’m a human being, I can’t take this anymore, you’re INSANE, no wonder everyone leaves you!” Ouch. So, Frost is alone again, and it’s here that he stumbles across a letter written to him about undeniable proof of Bigfoot himself. Filled with new energy, Frost crashes the party of the “League of Adventurers” or whatever to announce his plans to get proof of Bigfoot so they’ll finally accept him into the society. Lord Piggot-Dunceby (Stephen Fry), the head of the society and all around Not Nice Person, strikes a wager with Frost: if he brings back proof, he’ll be let into the society and respected. If he doesn’t, he never bothers them again.

Dunceby is convinced that Frost will fail, but not enough to not take some precautions of his own–he hires someone to kill Frost so any evidence he may or may not find will still never come to light and he’ll never have to deal with Frost again.

Frost, meanwhile, is determined and heads to the address specified in the letter. What he finds, however, is Bigfoot, the missing link himself (Zach Galifianakis). He’s mostly self-educated since he scares everyone off, and wrote to Frost because he hopes Frost will take him to the Himalayas to be with the Yetis, his cousins. He’s the only one of his kind, and he’s lonely, so he figures if he can be with his cousins, he won’t be so lonely anymore.

In exchange, Bigfoot promises to give Frost whatever proof he needs for the society. The deal is struck, and the bizarre duo head off on their adventure. Along the way, they must deal with Dunceby’s hitman, Willard Stenk (Timothy Olyphant), Frost’s old flame Adelina Fortnight (Zoe Saldana), and the hard truth that maybe seeking out family in the wrong people is something many of us are all too good at.

THE REVIEW

I admittedly went into this with very high expectations because, again, I love Laika.

What I got was a very good, very beautiful movie. It’s not my favorite Laika film (nothing beats ParaNorman, nothinggggggg) by any means, but it’s a darn good movie and a really fun one to watch.

I feel like this film, more than some others from Laika, had a lot more “kid humor” in it. Potty humor especially abounds, which is, well, a choice. It’s not necessary for the film (especially when they have really clever jokes about chickens…more on that later) as there are plenty of other ways to establish Mr. Link’s naivety, but I digress.

I feel like that element is really what takes me out of the story more than anything else. There’s also the point that this is a very short film, running about 85 minutes in total, and there’s a lot they have to cram in plot-wise. I refuse to complain about the runtime, however, because it’s stop-motion and the dedication to even get 85 minutes is astonishing to me. So like. Yeah.

Plus like…I’m not the target audience for this film. I may love Laika with all my heart, but this is still a kids’ movie, and kids think that stuff is hilarious. So fine.

All that aside, this is a great movie. It’s so charming and lovable and filled with really interesting political parallels. Just…we’ll get there.

So what is it that makes this movie such a delight? Let’s follow in the big footsteps of Laika’s new family adventure and figure that out.

…that was a stretch for a metaphor, I admit. MOVING ON.

Spoiler warning now in effect!!

THE MUSIC

The music, like the movie as a whole, is charming.

There are a couple musical moments that definitely stood out: “Westward Ho” is a fun track that plays during the montage of Frost traveling to America to find the sender of the letter. “Forest Primeval” is probably my favorite track, and plays when Frost first sees Mr. Link and chases him through the forest. It’s fun and mystical and since it plays before we know his personality, it helps paint the mystery around Mr. Link as Frost desperately tries to catch him. “Bar Brawl” is fun and ridiculous, just like the scene it accompanies. It starts out slow and otherwise unassuming, and then once the fighting kicks up and guys are punching each other for no reason, the instruments really get going and it’s just ridiculous.

Overall, while the music is good, it doesn’t really take center stage at any point during the film, and it doesn’t really need to. It’s good, but it doesn’t take over.

Also, the end credits song “Do-Dilly-Do (A Friend Like You)” is ADORABLE. Please listen to it if you need to feel happy, it should do the trick. And it’s been stuck in my head all day and I can’t even complain about it.

Also, fun fact, the composer is Carter Burwell, who also did the music for the Twilight series, Three Billboards, and A Knight’s Tale. So. The more you know.

THE CHARACTERS

Since characters in media mean a lot to me and I won’t get invested if I don’t care about them *cough*ALITABATTLEANGEL*cough*, a big reason Laika is so dear to my heart is that they create such good characters. But why?

Despite their incredibly stylized appearances, Laika characters feel like real people. None of the characters in any of their movies are perfect–they’re all flawed in different ways, and their journey in the film usually ties into confronting those flaws and how they affect the other people in their lives. Coraline was so convinced her mother didn’t love her that she ended up traveling to an alternate world where her Other Mother loved her a little too much. Norman was so afraid of and sick of being bullied for his unique power with ghosts that he ignored his destiny so long he almost destroyed the world. Kubo was a scared little kid who just wanted a normal family that he didn’t stop to see the found family he’d created (yeah and then the twist is that they were actually his parents all along, which…ehhhhhh anyway). I would discuss The Boxtrolls, but I haven’t actually seen it since it was in theaters and I don’t remember enough of it to comment. This “dealing with our flaws” thing is something we all have to do at some point, so it’s refreshing to see it have to happen to these cartoon characters in their fantastical worlds, too.

This whole “confronting flaws that affect other people in my life” trope is probably the most prevalent in Missing Link. Lionel Frost is, despite being the guy we follow the entire film while the other characters only come in later, obnoxious. He just is. He’s full of himself, convinced he can do no wrong, and he’s incredibly selfish. He plays it off by being suave and “adventure-savvy,” but he doesn’t realize how much his selfishness affects others. He is only able to find a real happy ending when he starts actually thinking of and caring for others, even if it costs him his precious reputation. Even then, it’s hinted that he’s still not totally learned his lesson, but he’s getting there: Mr. Link is wondering what he’s going to do now that his plan for a home has fallen through, and Frost says “well I’m in the market for a new valet!” And Adelina has to elbow him to remind him to say “a new partner.”

Despite this being probably the most like a typical kids’ film Laika has ever made, it’s the first film to follow an adult protagonist compared to a kid. While Frost’s problems are not kid problems, his journey is still a valuable lesson to kids about making sure you put effort into relationships with people who want you for exactly who you are, not for who you’re not.

Frost’s journey is, of course, mirrored with Mr. Link’s/Susan’s.

(One of my favorite scenes in the film is when Frost is asking Mr. Link to choose his own name, maybe based off of someone who really touched his heart and his life in a positive way. Link goes off about this one prospector who came and didn’t run off scared the second they saw him, and how kind they were. Frost enthusiastically declares that yes! That prospector’s name should be his name! What was the name? And Link smiles and says “Susan.” Frost is initially like “but wait that’s a girl’s name…you know what? It suits you. Susan it is.” Which like??? LOOK AT LAIKA SMASHING GENDERING AROUND NAMES. YOU GO, LAIKA. And for the rest of the review, Mr. Link is now Susan, because that’s his name.)

Susan is just as alone as Frost is, but unlike Frost, Susan realizes this. He doesn’t want to be alone anymore, and called in Frost specifically so that he could find others like him, his kind, his family. Susan is awkward, being self-taught with language, so he doesn’t understand sarcasm or specific sayings. For example, when they’re trying to break into Adelina’s house, Frost hands Susan a grappling hook attached to a rope so that they can climb over the wall. Frost tells him to “throw it over,” and Susan does just that: he throws the hook and the rope in its entirety over the wall. Frost, annoyed, holds out his bag with the rest of his tools and says “oh great, well why don’t you just throw this over the wall, too?” And Susan does, of course. Because he was told to.

While Frost has been educated in “polite society” and understands all of this, Susan does not, and much of the character’s charm and humor comes from this. Susan is like a child in many ways, just wanting to belong and not understanding why people do the things they do.

Frost initially separates himself as much as possible from Susan, not wanting to be associated with him beyond bringing back proof to Dunceby, but Adelina is the one who points out how similar and utterly alone the two characters are. This realization being spelled out for both Frost and the audience is why the ending of the film, where the two characters choose to stay together and be their own family, is so heartwarming and satisfying.

Adelina as a character is just…she’s a spitfire. She’s likable instantly because she doesn’t swoon over Frost like he expects, she’s not afraid to be angry and fight, but she’s also not afraid to be gentle and emotional when it’s called for. She’s a fully rounded-out female character, which is still a rarity in today’s media, as I’ve discussed in both my Alita: Battle Angel review and my Captain Marvel review.

While it’s established that Adelina and Frost have a romantic history, it doesn’t become the sole reason Adelina joins their adventure. She’s been cooped up at home since her husband’s death, and she wants to get out. She flirts with Frost as he gradually becomes a better person, but ultimately, she doesn’t choose to stay with him. She says he’s a great man, now, but she deserves greater. It’s so refreshing to see these two characters acknowledge a past flame between them that clearly caused them both some pain, heal through that, and then ultimately move on. Frost may have wanted her to stay, but he doesn’t ask her to. He lets her go because, again, he’s learning to not be so selfish anymore.

The villains are also one of my favorite parts of any Laika film. Like the heroes, they’re not perfect characters, and they always have some reason behind why they do what they do. Our main villain is Lord Piggot-Dunceby, the mastermind behind the plan to thwart Frost’s expedition and the leader of the Society for Great Men or whatever. Both he and his assistant guy very clearly state that they don’t like Frost, he’s weird, and they aren’t afraid to stoop to new lows to get rid of him. Dunceby complains that all these young people are trying to change the world that he knows, and he doesn’t like it. Electricity. Suffrage. All ridiculous things that he didn’t grow up with, so he doesn’t understand them and doesn’t like them, doesn’t want to learn to understand or like them, so he doesn’t think they’re necessary. In a way, he’s just as selfish as Frost, and in him, we see what happens to someone who never learns to outgrow that selfishness.

The other constant villain is the hitman, Stenk. Stenk is a mean little weasel of a man who resorts to whatever means necessary to get what he wants. Be this in the form of sneaking around to listen in on Frost’s plans, threatening Adelina to get Frost to give up, inciting a mob mentality on the ship so they attack Susan (who, it’s established early on, doesn’t actually like fighting and wishes people weren’t so scared of him), the list goes on and on. Like Dunceby, Stenk believes that things should be done the way they always have been done, and like Frost, he wants fame attached to his name. Stenk initially wants to kill off Frost so he can take credit for the Bigfoot discovery, and it’s that notion that makes Frost start the bar fight with him. If Dunceby is the ultimate example of Frost’s selfishness, Stenk is the ultimate example of Frost’s journey for power and fame. Stenk, like Frost, has no real family or friends and is ultimately alone. He’s convinced that having his name be known and being famous will fix all his problems, but his death at the end of the film ultimately affects…no one. He dies alone, and as we’ll discuss a little later, he chooses to. Stenk and Dunceby are important foils for Frost, because by the end of the movie, Frost sees how easy it is to become them, and he realizes that he doesn’t want to.

Also Emma Thompson makes an appearance as a Yeti elder once they reach the Himalayas and she’s great. We’ll get to the Yetis in a moment.

THE ART

Like all Laika films, Missing Link is beautiful to watch. Someone on tumblr mentioned that it’s probably Laika’s prettiest film to date, and I would definitely agree. While every Laika film does a great job at visual world-building, they’ve absolutely upped the ante with every film, and Missing Link is definitely a crowning achievement. They built different sets to show the bustling streets of London, the forests and towns of early North America, the ocean during a storm, the beautiful, lush scenery of India, and the towering mountains of the Himalayas. Every shot of scenery is done with the utmost care and you can absolutely tell. There’s even a shot during the end credits where they show the workers building the India set as the elephant puppet is controlled and walking around–you’re able to get just a sense of how much work goes into these movies, even in just a short, seconds-long clip, and it’s just astounding.

For the actual character puppets, Laika uses 3D printers to create every single facial expression the characters use, and they swap out each face on the puppet for each frame as needed. I was able to see some of the different printed faces used in Coraline at the Cartoon Art Museum in San Francisco, and wow. I highly recommend looking up behind the scenes stuff for Laika films, because it just makes watching the movies a whole new experience and you appreciate everything so much more.

The colors used in the film are bright and cheerful, especially when Frost first sets out on his Bigfoot expedition. The character designs are stylized and fun, especially Susan himself, who is just the embodiment of the word “lovable.”

I can’t truly do the visuals of the film justice through words, you really have to see it to experience it all and fully grasp what I mean. It’s a very pretty movie. It really is, but calling it that just doesn’t do it justice.

THE TWIST/THE END

While Missing Link does have a twist of sorts, it’s not really on the same narrative-changing scale as say, ParaNorman.

Our bedraggled travelers have finally reached their destination, populated by Yetis, Susan’s own kind! They’re greeted by a Yeti Elder, who asks why they have come. Frost and the Elder actually have an interesting back-and-forth, where Frost promises they are not there to destroy anything the Yetis have built. Susan says he just wants to be with his family.

The Elder looks at Susan and says “ah…yes…our…cousin. The redneck.” She takes the three outside to a hidden valley in the snow-covered mountains, which she says has remained untouched and pure and always should. Our protagonists swear they’re not here to change that, but the Elder doesn’t believe them. (A great funny moment is when Frost says “we found it! Shangri-La!” And the Elder says “it has many names. We call it *unintelligible roaring noise*. It means “Keep Out, We Hate You.”)

She has them thrown into “The Inescapable Pit of Misery and Disappointment,” and boy, you can just tell how disappointed Susan is at being thrown away to rot by those who should love and accept him because they’re family.

We expect the Yetis to be different, to be welcoming to Susan, whom we’ve come to love and adore over the course of the film…but the Yetis are exact mirrors of the Society of Cool Guys back in London that Frost is obsessed with. Adelina points out that both Frost and Susan have been so busy desperately trying to prove themselves to people who don’t even want them, they don’t notice how alike they both are. She calls “the Great Lionel Frost” a myth, just like the monsters he chases, because he isn’t a great man. He isn’t even a good one.

Something about this strikes a chord in Frost, and he tells Susan to get up, because he’s going to fulfill his end of the bargain: he’s going to take Susan to where he belongs.

*cue EVERYONE CRYING but mostly me, probably*

The group manages to escape the Pit and evade the Yetis (while the Elder yells “quick! The people we don’t want here are escaping!!”) only to be stopped on the ice bridge by none other than Dunceby and Stenk (and the assistant guy whose name I completely forgot). Dunceby, determined to make sure Frost’s discovery never sees the light of day so he can’t outshine him, breaks the ice bridge, yelling out what would have once been Frost’s greatest nightmare and probably still is Dunceby’s: “no one will remember your name!”

It’s not Frost’s greatest fear anymore, though. His greatest fear now is losing the ones he’s come to care so much about, so they run. Dunceby, so caught up in his fury and obsession, doesn’t realize what he’s done until it’s too late, and he falls as the bridge breaks.

The whole thing is falling apart, now, as the characters desperately try to outrun it. The assistant guy is unable to and also ends up falling to his death. Then it’s just Frost, Adelina, and Susan, all tied together with a rope and hanging on for dear life. Stenk is safe, and is all set to drop the heroes to their doom. Frost says that he doesn’t have to, Dunceby is gone, now! But Stenk says that it isn’t about the paycheck anymore, he just genuinely hates Frost at this point and wants him gone, especially by his hand.

In the ensuing confrontation, our heroes manage to work together to safely reach the top of the cliff, while Stenk, so determined to off Frost, also falls into the rocks below.

Normally, in Laika films, the villains are developed in such a way that we want to see them be redeemed–they’re fully-formed characters just as much as the protagonists are, so there has to be a chance, right?

The difference here is that even if there is a chance for these three characters, they don’t want to change. They’re so caught up in their hatred and fear of Frost changing things and overshadowing them that their deaths serve as a sort of metaphor: they let their negativity rule their lives so much that it overpowered them and caused their ultimate demise. While Frost serves as a reminder that it’s so, so easy to become like those characters, it’s also just as easy to not become like them.

There’s a fascinating scene earlier in the film where Dunceby learns that Frost has evaded Stenk yet again and still lives. Dunceby throws a literal temper tantrum, in public, in front of all these people, and then proclaims that Frost’s existence is the “destruction of civilized society!!”

…Really?

It’s fitting, then, that he causes his own death by destroying something beautiful–an ice bridge that leads to Shangri-La itself.

While the assistant guy seems a little unsure of some of Dunceby’s actions, he ultimately stands by him and supports Dunceby’s decision to send a literal hitman after the guy. He dies trying to escape the results of Dunceby’s actions, and he’s unable to. While the assistant guy didn’t call any of the shots on his own, he certainly didn’t make any effort to stop Dunceby, and it caught up with him later.

Stenk is offered a chance by Frost. Frost says that Dunceby is gone, this doesn’t matter anymore! But Stenk is so obsessed with the principal of the thing, he puts his revenge ahead of anything else, his belief that Frost is still the bad guy…and it costs him dearly.

Now I don’t know how intentional any kind of political metaphor is in this movie, but I’m just saying…it’s interesting that all the villains work for a “Society of Great and Awesome Men” who believe that “men shape the world!” (“But I’ve learned that the world shapes us!” Frost says in response to this at the end) and that any kind of opposition to this way of life is a threat to everything they hold dear. They’re all old white guys. I’m just saying.

Dunceby even yells at Frost “you’ve aligned yourself with apes and women!” As if that’s an insult. Both the audience and Frost, by this point, have learned that both Susan and Adelina are so much more than that. But Dunceby refuses to see that because it goes against what he believes and it threatens his power.

There’s so much more we can talk about–how easily Stenk tries to stir up a mob on the ship by pointing at Susan carrying Adelina (he just rescued her) and yelling “look! A monster! And he’s got a defenseless girl!” Susan responds to this by saying “monster?” While Adelina says “DEFENSELESS??”

Or how Dunceby is introduced as a character by telling some long, drawn-out tale about his conquests and by waving a gun around.

Or how Dunceby tells Frost that the Society is renowned for traveling the world and “conquering and rescuing the savages” they come across.

Or how easily all the guys in the bar started fighting once just one person starts fighting, but Susan makes a face and doesn’t want to–who’s supposed to be the civilized one, again?

Or how Frost & Co. made a point of respecting Gamu the elder and asking for her help to find Shangri-La, whereas Dunceby & Co. made a point of threatening her, and when that didn’t work, threatening her baby grandson so they could get information out of her.

I’M JUST. SAYING.

FAVORITE MOMENT

I absolutely adored that entire opening sequence with the Loch Ness monster, it was just so fun and quirky. But I also totally loved the entire “dinner with Gamu” scene and all the jokes about the chicken (the chicken that we don’t talk about, of course). While my favorite moments are probably the funny ones because I think they’re executed so well, I also just enjoyed (of course) the visuals for the movie as a whole.

“OOF” MOMENT

Pretty much anything that was like, potty humor. It’s just not my cup of tea, and while I don’t think it ruined the movie by any means, it did distract at times. A lot of it was framed around Susan’s ignorance and general “not knowing how things work” and all that, which like, at least it makes sense, and one or two jokes would have been fine and still fit the character and narrative, but I just felt like there was too much of it. Again, though, I’m not the target audience, and I get it. I think it’s unfortunate, but I get it.

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

Yes.

Look, my bias for Laika aside, this is a very good movie. It’s charming, it’s witty, it’s uplifting, and if you enjoy possibly unintentional but definitely can be pointed out political commentary that ends in a satisfying way, this movie is for you.

I think it’s so important to support studios like Laika. They put out consistently good films, and they work damn hard on them. There is unbelievable love and care put into every inch of their movies, and it’s not just a movie when they’re done with it: it’s a piece of art.

It’s not my favorite Laika film, it’s not the best movie I’ve ever scene, but it’s damn good and just a lot of fun. And again, we want to support studios like Laika and all the work they do.

Actually pretty much any studio putting out good animated films and isn’t Disney.

Nothing against Disney, just…well, okay, kind of something against Disney. They run the world and maybe like they shouldn’t.

Animated movies don’t get nearly the love and attention that they should because they’re animated, and it’s viewed as just a kids’ medium that can’t carry the emotional weight other films do. Studios like Laika prove that that simply isn’t the case. Animation can be just as breathtaking as live-action, just as powerful, and just as emotional.

Studios like Laika and Cartoon Saloon (The Secret of Kells, The Song of the Sea, The Breadwinner) are proving that animation is a great medium for great stories, and I think we should all support them in that.

Overall, I give Missing Link

4/5 SASQUATCHES!!!

Look, they’re happy to see you!

TRAILERS TO WATCH OUT FOR:

Pretty much everything was a repeat and also showed before Dumbo, with one exception…

They’re making an animated movie of The Addams Family and it looks like it might actually be really, really good.

Other than that, same old, same old.

So that about does it for this review!

If you love Laika like I do, if you want to take your kids to a movie that won’t make you want to die a little inside, if you love a good story with good characters, if you just need an evening to relax and escape to another world where everything turns out happy, if you love found family stories, I highly recommend you take yourself to the movies and see Missing Link.

…we won’t get into how a bunch of stop-motion puppets have more facial expressions than a certain character in Dumbo…I swear……

………….but they totally do.

Dumbo (2019) REVIEW

So last week, I took myself to the movies and saw Dumbo, Tim Burton’s take on the 1941 Disney animated film.

I was apprehensive because the 1941 Dumbo is definitely not one of my favorite films–I mostly remember it just being kind of strange (and then I was scarred for life by that INSANE PINK ELEPHANTS SCENE). I know there are some diehard fans for the original, and nothing against that, it just wasn’t my cup of tea and I had no desire to revisit it before seeing this version.

On the other hand, it’s Tim Burton!!

I can say that it’s definitely a fun movie, it’s an absolute assault on the senses in typical Burton/Elfman fashion (in the best way), and it’s a good time.

Is it great?

Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh……

THE PLOT

It’s 1919! Circuses abound! Button-down shirts! Boots! Trains! Animal abuse! Yay!

…wait.

We start off by following the train for the Medici Brothers Circus, featuring such acts as a strongman, a mermaid, a horse-training duo, and elephants. As the train makes their next stop and tents begin to rise, we meet Milly (Nico Parker) and Joe (Finley Hobbins). Milly has a cage of pet mice dressed for their own little circus (this is a reference to Timothy Q. Mouse from the original, but other than that, this little mouse circus of Milly’s is never explained) and she is giving them a check-up to establish that Milly is a Modern Girl (ohhhhh the theater nerd in me just realized…”Thoroughly Modern Millie” the musical…ughhhhhhhhhhhh) interested in ridiculous things like Science. Joe is younger than Milly and is just generally excited about everything. For instance, there’s a train!

Milly and Joe run through the circus to the train platform, looking for someone, and suddenly there he is: COLIN FARRELL! Okay, actually it’s their dad, Holt, played by Colin Farrell. They run to meet him (as I would do if I saw Colin Farrell on a train platform) but stop short when they see he’s missing an arm. Holt has just returned from fighting in World War I, and he’s come back to be with his kids and work in the circus again.

It’s clear there’s some tension between Holt and the kids as he greets them and goes to meet with the ring leader Max Medici himself (Danny DeVito) about getting his job in the circus back. Medici gives a great speech chock full of exposition to explain that not only did Holt’s wife die of influenza while he was away (and his kids had to endure that without him), but Medici also sold the horses Holt used in his act. But all is not lost! Medici recently purchased a ~pregnant elephant~ and since everyone loves babies, this will boost ticket sales like crazy and give Holt a job as the elephant guy!!

Holt is distressed, naturally, as he tries to come to terms with how much things have changed. We meet Rufus who is the current (?) elephant guy and a Grade A Worst Human Being Ever. Rufus doesn’t like Holt because he’s Decent, and also he’s taking his job? I think? Anyway, the pregnant elephant has given birth, and once the baby shakes off all the straw it was hiding in, it’s revealed to be not…typical.

Baby and Mrs. Jumbo are super close, and Milly and Joe immediately connect with the outcast baby elephant, but the rest of the circus members are kind of…meh about it. Medici in particular is convinced all is lost and he’s doomed, and Holt is tasked with hiding the baby’s massive ears for his debut performance.

So Baby Jumbo is dressed up for his debut to be carted around the tent, but since Rufus is the Worst Human Being Ever, he purposely causes a stampede with the elephants just to make Holt look bad (and to like, ruin the circus’s reputation in general but I don’t think he thought that hard about it). Fearing for her baby, Mrs. Jumbo storms in, chaos reigns, everyone’s screaming, and the tent collapses (in an ironic twist, the only casualty of this event is none other than Rufus himself).

(Also–Baby Jumbo was wheeled around in a carriage that said “Dear Baby Jumbo” but in the chaos of the stampede, the letters get messed up so it spells out “ear Baby Dumbo.” Milly suggests they keep the name instead of calling him Baby Jumbo just because it might make him think of his mom and make him sad. So at least it puts a slightly more positive spin on the original, where Dumbo was a cruel name given to him by the other elephants)

Mrs. Jumbo is labeled a mad elephant, and Medici sells her in a desperate attempt to save face and get money. Around the same time, Milly and Joe discover something unbelievable–Dumbo can fly! But no one believes them. During an accident at the following performance, however, Dumbo does fly, and now the circus is famous for it! Unfortunately, this draws the attention of V. A. Vandevere (Michael Keaton), who competes with Rufus for the title of Worst Human Being Ever.

The rest of the film is an exploration of family, power, and what really matters most in life: REUNITING DUMBO WITH HIS MOM. Oh and like, love, too. I guess.

THE REVIEW

So like, let me start off by saying that this movie has an excellent opening. I mean you are plunged right in to the Burton/Elfman madness and it’s INCREDIBLE. I mean I was watching and already giving this movie 6/5.

Then…we got introduced to the human characters.

Perhaps the biggest change from the original (except the removal of certain…crows…) is the emphasis on the human characters. I’ll go more into detail in that section, but I really think unfortunately that the human characters are why the film isn’t…great. Part of the issue is that they have all new storylines and nothing to pull from the original film, which I get. But because there is so much emphasis put on them, it’s a shame they’re really not developed all that well.

…I mean I say that, but some of the human characters are awesome. It’s a fine line that, again, I’ll get into later.

Generally, the movie has some really impressive points and some really disappointing points, and unfortunately, it’s so strongly one way or the other that the film suffers for it. Some of the characters are so lacking that they hurt the overall story. Some of them are so strong that all you can do is wish the others were more like them. Visually it’s so striking and fun that it’s disappointing when you aren’t looking at the detailed circus sets because you’re stuck with a forced emotional scene instead. The music is so intense and fun and whimsical that it almost seems out of place with the more lackluster moments.

But overall, I do think it’s a good movie. It was fun to watch, and in true Burton/Elfman fashion, I was absolutely transported to another time and place for the duration and it was a fun ride.

So what exactly is it that makes the film both so good and so meh at the same time?

Spoiler warning now in effect as we soar into the details of this Dumbo reimagining!

THE MUSIC

THE MUSIC. THE MUSIC THE MUSIC THE MUSIC.

*ahem*

Okay, so the music is Danny Elfman, which means it’s just…it’s phenomenal. It’s so good, you guys.

What I’ve always loved about Burton and Elfman’s teamwork is how well they work together with sight and sound to create a story. Elfman’s compositions serve to transport the viewer to somewhere magical just as much as Burton’s visuals do. The soundtrack just gives off incredibly fun “magic circus” vibes. Do you know how long it’s been since I’ve gone to a circus? I barely remember the last time I was at one (I don’t really count Cirque de Soleil because it was a school thing and also that’s like Rich People Circus), but the soundtrack for Dumbo brings you to a circus just with just a couple notes.

My favorite tracks include “Train’s A Comin'” (IT PLAYS OVER THE CIRCUS TRAIN ARRIVING AND THE SOUND EFFECTS OF THE TRAIN MATCH UP WITH THE DRUMS AND IT!! IS AN EXPERIENCE!!), “The Homecoming” (that fun guitar melody that then slows down when the kids see their dad again and he’s missing an arm like THEY DON’T NEED WORDS BECAUSE THE MUSIC DOES IT ALL), “Goodbye Mrs. Jumbo” (it’s Dumbo’s theme song but slowed down and sad and just WHY), “Pink Elephants On Parade (2019)” (MORE ON THIS LATER OHHHHHHHMYGOD), and “Soaring Suite” (this is like if the words “uplifting and magical” were music).

I just…I can’t do it justice with words, y’all. It’s on Spotify, please listen to it, that’s the only way to really feel it.

“But I’m not a movie music nerd like you” YOU WILL LISTEN TO IT AND YOU WILL LIKE IT.

Also, we have to discuss “Baby Mine,” of course. Just like the heartbreaking scene in the original, this plays while Mrs. Jumbo and Dumbo are separated after she’s labeled a mad elephant. She reaches her trunk through the bars to hold her son, who’s trying to reach her with his short little baby trunk. This time, though, the music comes from the various circus members, singing around a campfire. They’re clearly disheartened by the day’s events, and it’s a solemn scene as they sing and play instruments together, layered with the shots of Dumbo and his mom trying to reach each other.

Anyway. I’m not crying. Moving on.

Listen to the soundtrack.

THE CHARACTERS

Fun fact: that is the daughter’s facial expression the entire damn film.

So here’s the thing–I like the idea behind the human characters. I mean, think about it: a WWI vet returns to his home, the circus, missing an arm to find that his wife has died and the act he used to perform with her can no longer be. He can’t connect to his kids because he doesn’t know how to without their mom, not to mention, they had to endure her death without him. He can’t even begin to imagine their experiences. Then, the baby elephant he’s tasked with taking care of does connect with his kids, and that’s even before the elephant’s mother is taken away, too. He soon realizes that this baby elephant, this “abomination,” is the way to reconnect with his kids, and he wants that.

It’s hard, though, when this rich fancy guy shows up and gives his kids everything he’s unable to–a beautiful house with individual rooms, immediate belief in his daughter’s scientific dreams, and fame and fortune for their new best friend, the baby elephant.

So what does he do when the new guy gives the order to have the baby elephant’s mother killed? What can he do but be the hero his kids have always hoped he could be?

It’s an interesting idea to mirror the kids’ loss of their mother with Dumbo’s. It gives the kids motivation to reunite the elephants besides just “they’re kids and they believe in happy endings.” Milly and Joe want to reunite Dumbo and his mom because they would have done anything to reunite with their own mom–it’s why they can be frustrated by their father’s lack of belief both in them and in himself.

It’s such a shame this doesn’t translate in the film, then.

I found myself not really liking many of the human characters, but I couldn’t put a finger on why until Vandevere showed up. See, Vandevere, for as incredibly evil as he is, is so much fun. He’s a genuine cartoon villain come to life, he’s over-the-top ridiculous, and because of that, he’s probably the one human character I actually liked. It’s almost like Burton was like “okay, we can’t really push for realism in a story like this, so the villain doesn’t have to be realistic, either.”

And it works!!

Because the rest of the film is so stylistic and unrealistic, Vandevere fits right into the world the film creates and he’s an enjoyable character even though he’s the villain.

Everyone else, though?

Let me start by saying I love Colin Farrell, and we know he can play the estranged and troubled father because he does it incredibly well in Saving Mr. Banks. It just doesn’t translate as well here because, again, he’s almost too realistic for this outlandish story. If he’d been allowed to be a little more quirky, for example, he’d have fit into the world more and thus, been more likable. He did a great job though with what he had, it’s just that what he had seems like it should be from an entirely different movie; a realistic story about a failing circus rather than one that involves big-eared, flying elephants.

Eva Green’s Colette has to (literally and figuratively) walk this tightrope between cartoonish and realistic. She’s cartoonish for the most part, and I do like her character a lot, but she’s not developed to the same degree as the main family and Vandevere, so she feels incomplete. She’s still good, and mostly likable, and she doesn’t feel as out of place as Colin Farrell’s Holt does.

Danny DeVito’s Max Medici is ridiculously cartoony and fun in the beginning, so he fits in, but it’s not entirely clear what makes him change his mind to help the original circus group–after all, he was shown to primarily be interested in money, so why the sudden change of heart? Yeah Vandevere wanted to fire everyone from his original circus, but he was never shown to have really bonded with them in the first place. I’m glad he does have a change of heart, and it makes his speech at the end about the new circus really heartwarming, but again, there was some key element of development that’s just missing for him.

Joe has some really sweet moments, and I liked him just because he was always so excited and eager to please, but those are pretty much his only two character traits. He primarily serves as Milly’s helper, and while Milly and Holt get to have a nice father-daughter moment, Joe never gets anything of the equivalent, which kinda sucks, frankly.

The main circus ensemble are all pretty likable with the little dialogue they have, but like many of the other characters, they aren’t developed enough to really get graded as fully fleshed-out characters.

My biggest issue is with Milly. She drives me crazy.

I kept trying to make excuses for her. Maybe she’s like this because again, she had to watch her mom, whom she was clearly very close with, die. She had to take charge caring for her brother in their mom’s absence. She likes Science!

The bottom line is, however, that Milly has exactly one emotion through the entire film, and it’s 😐

Not that you couldn’t do something with that, you absolutely could, but Milly is supposed to be the emotional center of the film. It is her connection with Dumbo and her strained relationship with Holt that are supposed to drive so much of the story, and it just doesn’t work when she says all her lines like this 😐

Even when she charges up the ladder to get Dumbo a feather so he can fly out of the flames, and she falls and has to get pulled away, she doesn’t fight or try to get back to Dumbo, she doesn’t scream in worry for him, she doesn’t look concerned at all.

She looks like 😐

IT IS INSANE.

It is especially out of place in such a cartoony film. She’s surrounded by flying elephants and theme parks designed by Tim Burton and she just 😐

Dumbo, a CGI elephant, has more facial expressions and shows more emotion during this movie than our leading emotional character.

I mean, put her in a horror movie with creepy kids and I’m sure she’d do great, but FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. THIS IS A KID’S MOVIE. BE A KID. SHOW SOME WONDER. I DON’T CARE IF YOU’RE EXCITED ABOUT SCIENCE, SCIENCE IS COOL AND CALLS FOR FACIAL EXPRESSIONS. YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE DOES?

FLYING. ELEPHANTS.

The point is, the human characters could have worked. Many of them mostly do. But the character that is supposed to emotionally connect and invest us in the story and Dumbo himself just…

😐

Now don’t get me wrong, you can absolutely have an emotionless/seemingly emotionless character at the center of your film. You just can’t also have that character be the emotional center of your film. It just contradicts…everything.

And look, I get it, she’s a child actor. Unfortunately, I’m going to compare her to the likes of other child actors like, say, Millie Bobby Brown of Stranger Things fame or Sophia Lillis of It and Nancy Drew and the Hidden Staircase. I’m sure she can do great, just maybe not as the emotional center of a kid’s movie about flying elephants. I’m telling you, though, if she was cast as the creepy kid in a horror movie? She’d be awesome. Stop making films about creepy little boys and cast Nico Parker instead. For this particular movie, I just don’t think she was cast correctly.

And honestly, Dumbo does a great job all on his own on making us care about him.

But I genuinely think that the human characters, and Milly in particular, are really what keep this good movie from being great.

THE ART

So as you can tell from above, because it’s Tim Burton, the film is a visual marvel. Yeah it’s supposed to take place in our world in 1919, but stylistically, it feels like it takes place in an alternate version of our world where maybe elephants can fly.

Pigs, too, probably.

I mentioned the opening shot with the circus train in the music section (THE TRAIN SOUNDS!!! MATCH THE DRUM BEATS!!!!!), but it truly does a beautiful job of setting up the film. The train itself, being completely Burton-ized, looks like a face–every part of the train, in fact, looks just cartoony enough to not be real. All the sets in the film stand on this line of being sort of realistic but not quite. It reminds me a little of the engagement party scene in Burton’s Alice in Wonderland, where everything looks real and as you’d expect but also just ever so slightly…off.

In a good way! I know Alice in Wonderland wasn’t necessarily a favorite when it was released, and I know Dumbo now isn’t getting rave reviews, but I do think these kind of stories are ideal for Burton. He does well with stories where characters are transported to an alternate land where things don’t have to make sense, and he does really well with circus stories (first Big Fish and now this??). Think about it: the main goal of a circus is to promise the impossible is real, to fool you into believing in magic. Burton’s style plays into circus stories because he specializes in the fantastical with the real, the impossible with the possible.

Also, he got to have Danny DeVito play a ringmaster again, which I’m sure was fun.

You would think it would be too much, and especially when Vandevere’s Dreamland comes into play, it almost feels like too much to take in for both you as the audience member and the characters onscreen. It never crosses that line, though. Everything visually in the film is a feast for the eyes in the best possible way, and everything has meaning and care behind it.

So much so that, like I mentioned above, scenes without all the visual marvel that rely on the characters to carry us through are sorely lacking. Pretty much any scene that focuses solely on the interactions and dialogues between the human characters are dull in comparison, and they shouldn’t be. The scenes where the kids connect with Dumbo are hard to get through, partly because we don’t have any fun circus scenery and mostly because we have to deal with Milly. Scenes where the emotions of the characters should provide all the spectacle we need are hurting, because when Milly and Joe are talking about “well maybe Dumbo misses his mom, we have to help him, we miss our mom, too!” And then “my mom gave me this key to look at whenever I felt like there was a door I couldn’t get through. Maybe I’ll still feel like I can’t open it, but the key reminds me that there’s always a way” are all said in the flattest possible way.

The visuals are stunning. The costumes are amazing. But they shouldn’t have to bear the weight of the characters’ lack of feeling through the entire film, and unfortunately, they do.

The opening scene with the train and the circus being set up is fun and loud and truly feels magical, and it’s a shame the rest of the movie doesn’t quite live up to it (kind of like how the opening number of La La Land promised great things and then you left the theater carrying the broken pieces of your heart and also your dreams).

There’s another moment later in the film, however, where that magic comes back, if only for a moment.

We have to talk about pink elephants.

This is quite possibly my favorite scene in the film, which is kind of funny considering it’s my least favorite scene from the original. Dumbo doesn’t get drunk in the 2019 version, but there are still pink elephants dancing. As a way to prepare the audience at Dreamland’s Colosseum for Dumbo’s act, performers take giant bubble wands and in unison, create magic with them.

It’s unclear whether or not the bubbles actually form the elephants or if Dumbo’s just seeing things (hey, he’s probably never seen bubbles before), but it’s an absolutely spellbinding sight and honestly may be worth the price of admission alone (maybe). It’s a beautiful scene rather than a slightly terrifying one, and it manages to be just as overwhelming as the original animation but in an entirely different way. Dumbo gets caught up in the beauty of it just as much as we do.

I like to think of it as Dumbo and the rest of the Medici Bros. Circus members not being drunk literally, but rather being drunk on this new power and fame they suddenly possess.

Am I reading too much into it? Probably.

But seriously, it’s genuinely a spellbinding scene. I was actually shocked when I found out that the track for that scene was only 1:47–during the film, it feels like a full 4 minutes at least. Not because it felt like it went on forever in a bad way, it just felt like a full-length intense dance number that you don’t want to end, and it was less than two minutes??

Iconic.

THE “SUBTLETY”

Dumbo is not one for subtlety when it comes to the film’s message(s).

And honestly, it’s executed in such a fun way that for the most part, I’m okay with it.

For example, a large focus of the film is family, obviously. Holt has to find a way to reconnect with his own kids without his wife, Dumbo just wants his mom and she just wants him, and it’s implied that the circus ensemble all find family in each other (or they just believed that all along, they’re not really developed enough for us to say for sure).

This actually all comes to a head with our good ol’ baddie Vandevere. It starts when he introduces us to Colette, his…girlfriend? Her relationship with him is never explicitly explained, but it can be implied that she likes money and he has it. But Vandevere has no “real” family of his own to speak of. He then pulls Medici aside when he’s discussing buying out the circus, to which he says “I know there’s no other Medici. You probably wanted one, though.”

The circus is called “Medici Bros. Circus,” but Vandevere is right; Max Medici is actually the only one, there are no “brothers.” That’s partly why Medici is so easily swayed by Vandevere’s offer. He wants the money, sure, but he also wants to have a partner. He wants to belong to something bigger than himself.

This whole family idea comes to a head when Holt thanks Vandevere for the nice lodgings he and his kids receive, to which Vandevere simply replies “of course! Your family’s mine.”

I don’t know how it translates in writing, but when you hear him say that, your brain automatically finishes the saying: “your family is my family.” But that ain’t what he says. Vandevere makes it clear that he owns people, he doesn’t stoop down to the level of belonging with them.

This is made even more clear when Colette’s backstory is revealed: she was a street performer in Paris, Vandevere saw her, offered her more. There is no actual connection with them at all, he just owns her.

So when Vandevere goes absolutely bonkers in the last act of the film and everyone abandons him, it’s easy to infer why: everyone else has found family in each other because they sacrifice for each other and help each other. Vandevere would never do that for any of them, so they don’t help him when his whole amusement park burns to the ground–they leave him.

True family can’t be bought.

Colette and Vandevere have some fun and ridiculously over-the-top dialogue during their final confrontation as well. Colette and Dumbo fly to the tower that serves as the main power source for the park and shut it all down so they can get Mrs. Jumbo out. Vandevere storms inside and yells “WHAT HAPPENED TO MY POWER???”

To which Colette simply replies, “what power?”

GET IT. BECAUSE HE NEVER HAD ANY REAL POWER. LOVE WAS THE REAL POWER ALL ALONG AND HE HAS NONE.

GET IT.

Then, as Colette is leaving with Dumbo, he screams after her “YOU WERE NOTHING BEFORE I MADE YOU MY…MY…”

And Colette smugly looks at him and says “I believe the word you’re looking for is queen” and then she flies off with Dumbo like a badass leaving Vandevere sputtering after her.

GET IT. GET IT.

Okay, anyway.

And then it all comes together at the end because the circus is back together (sans a couple elephants) and now it’s called the Medici Family Circus instead.

GET IT.

Also there’s a real slap-you-in-the-face message about how animals shouldn’t be kept in cages or something. I’m just saying, if Dumbo’s mom had been raised in captivity, she wouldn’t know how to survive in the wild. Luckily we know she was actually captured as a pregnant adult, so the wild is what she knows and she’ll do fine. All Dumbo knows is people, but he has his mom in the wild to guide him. But if she’d been raised in captivity, the best thing to do would be to keep her but treat her well. It’s clear that prior to the Medici Family Circus, the animals were abused like crazy, and that’s absolutely accurate to 1919 circus life. But releasing an angry, abused animal into the wild is like sticking a target on their back–it doesn’t benefit anyone (except a very lucky predator, maybe).

Anyway, nothing is subtle, but that fits right alongside the overall cartooniness of it all.

(Also, we can absolutely talk about how ironic it is that Dumbo, as a “freak of nature” becomes a huge money-maker for an amusement park that looks a lot like Disneyland. They even show a vendor selling out of Dumbo plush toys every night–toys that look like the original animated Dumbo. And that park burns to the ground, the “freak of nature” is allowed to leave and be happy with his mom so he’s not on display every night for cruel humans, and the circus members find family performing with each other, not for others. It’s just interesting that a Disney film seems to be really taking a jab at how Disney runs things…especially with all those live-action remakes on the horizon…ANYWAY………)

THE ELEPHANTS

DO YOU LIKE CRYING??? Great.

All I could think of while watching this film was the different things I’ve read and heard about elephants in the past couple years or so.

For example, a study was done by UC Davis to research elephants and the different relationships they have with humans. They concluded that elephants can absolutely form special relationships with humans, which is especially interesting because unlike domesticated animals, they haven’t been bred over generations to get used to us. Of course it’s also true that elephants can be absolutely hostile to humans and to be fair, if you’re out hunting elephants, you absolutely deserve whatever the elephants do to you.

Another example was a study published in 2014 that stated that elephants will aid and care for other elephants when they’re sick or dying. If they hear another elephant in distress, they will go to them and respond with calls and touches to console them.

Elephants can suffer from PTSD–this can be caused by being tortured, abused, forced into captivity, or witnessing the death of a family member by a poacher.

They have a complex family and social system in their herds, where the elders instruct the young how to interpret calls and follow specific social cues. If the elders are killed, that information is never passed down to the younger elephants.

Perhaps most interestingly, elephants seem to mourn for their dead. If they encounter the remains or skeleton of another elephant, they slow down and will touch the bones with their trunk–they don’t do this for other remains they come across.

There’s even research that reports that elephants seem to cry as an emotional response.

Elephants are crazy complex creatures, and it makes having them be at the center of a movie like this all the more powerful, especially one scene in particular.

Throughout the film, Dumbo and his mom clearly have a very strong bond. They have a powerful connection, to the point where Dumbo is able to recognize his mom’s call all the way across Dreamland to where she’s being kept (in an attraction called “Nightmare Island” where they keep all the world’s “most dangerous animals”). At first I remember thinking “yeah right” but?? Knowing what we do about elephants, why wouldn’t he be able to recognize her call? I mean jeez, penguins can do it!

This is why the ending scene with Dumbo and his mom is so beautiful, because it’s so good to see them together and happy, finally.

But all that we know about elephants makes the “Baby Mine” scene even more upsetting. Of course Dumbo would reach for his mom with his little trunk. Of course his mom would reach out and cradle him with her trunk. Of course they would cry. OF COURSE.

Let’s not forget that the only reason Dumbo’s mom is chained up in this scene is because Rufus (Worst Human Being Ever) purposely put her baby in danger. Of course she heard him crying. Of course she sensed his fear. Of course she came running for him. He’s her baby. OF COURSE.

It’s the one scene that feels appropriately emotional, and it’s all because of CGI elephants.

My last three brain cells trying to figure my life out

FAVORITE MOMENT

I think it’s probably obvious because I’ve talked about the scenes extensively, but I love the pink elephants scene and “Baby Mine.” One is so ridiculously over-the-top it’s great, and one is just calm and sad and emotional its great.

“OOF” MOMENT

…can I say anytime Milly spoke?

Okay, okay, fine. Really it’s almost any time they tried to have an emotional scene with any of the human characters, it just never really comes across right. It never reaches the level of “Baby Mine,” and that would be fine except they make it seem like those scenes are supposed to hit that level. They just don’t.

Also, the whole “Medici Family Circus” montage has Danny DeVito break the fourth wall and talk right to the camera and it’s just…a choice.

SHOULD YOU TAKE YOURSELF TO SEE THIS MOVIE?

I think it’s very likely that for all my griping about the humans, it’s possible to not have it be that big a deal. Again, as much as it’s played out as being the main story of the film, it’s really not.

Despite all the 😐 , there’s still a whole lot of incredible scenery, stunning music, fantastic villainy from Michael Keaton, and a really cute little baby elephant.

This is still a very good movie, and it’s certainly a really fun time going to see it. If you need some escapism, you like Tim Burton/Danny Elfman, you like elephants, you like Dumbo, and you don’t care about emotional scenes and how they’re portrayed and you think I need to chill out, I definitely say go for it, see this movie.

It’s good. It’s not great, but it’s good. And it’s fun. And you’ll cry a little and then be all inspired about family or something.

Overall, I give Dumbo…

3.5/5 MAGICAL FLYING FEATHERS!!

I have no idea if the whole “Dumbo has to fly with a feather” is a key thing in the original film, but it was like a really big deal in this one. Until he realized that he didn’t need a feather to fly, the ~Magic Was Inside Him All Along~.

Or something.

TRAILERS TO WATCH OUT FOR

We had a couple repeats (Ugly Dolls, for example) but also some new ones that we get to talk about! Missing Link is the newest film from the studio LAIKA, probably one of my favorite studios ever in the world, so I will absolutely be seeing it (in fact at the time of writing this I have already seen it and that review is on its way!).

I…can’t believe I’m about to say this, but…Dora and the Lost City of Gold looks…really…good? Like I genuinely don’t know how to approach this movie for the most part, but like…I mean I’m gonna see it, I just…I mean you don’t understand, it’s like someone saw that College Humor video and said “no but REALLY THOUGH.” And now here we are. Wow.

Abominable looks like it could be really, really cute, so I definitely want to see that. I am all for this sudden trend of movies where characters befriend mythological creatures and go on adventures. Can we have a Mothman adventure next??

Aladdin is…a movie…I mean, okay, I loved Aladdin as a kid. I also loved the character Aladdin as a kid because, I mean, c’mon. Plus, Robin Williams at his finest, really. Of course I’m gonna see it, and maybe it’ll be good, but also like…there has been no sign of Iago in any of the trailers and I have SEVERAL CONCERNS, OKAY.

And that about does it for this review! If this sounds like something you’d enjoy (and again, it is just generally a very good time), I say take yourself to the movies and see Dumbo.

Just like…don’t get too excited about it.

😐

Okay I’m done. I’ll stop.